The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
01/19/12
Wow - that poor MC had a lot going on in her day! Nicely done, and cute story. Your certainly were on topic. Perfect ending - God Bless~
Nice message in this piece. Cute story too.
01/20/12
Great positive approach with credible vignettes along the way.
01/20/12
Such a wonderful message ... and a great scene with Mom and daughter sharing together.

This was a really good piece of writing. Thanks!
This is a sweet story. It would be perfect for a preteen Sunday School flyer or magazine. In the beginning when the MC is thinking in italics, you have one though with quoatation marks, but the next one has none. I think either way is acceptable, just be consistent.

Then near the end, you use a single ' to mark a quote within sentence but you end the original sentence with the quote inside it you need to use both--'"

Love how you infused the topic throughout the whole story. Delighful!
01/22/12
Delightful read...but I have to admit having your retainer fall out on the table in front of your brand new ex and his new girl would be highly embarrassing. My heart really went out to the girl over that! Love the mother telling her God would take the pain of the embarrassment away. Good job!
01/23/12
Poor little Jan sure had a rough day! But she handled it well! It was pleasant to see the good relationship between mom and daughter! God bless!