Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: REDUCE (11/05/15)
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TITLE: Distraction Equals Destruction | Previous Challenge Entry
By Sanna Scales
11/11/15 -
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Life and its many paths can cause us to go through a maze of different distractions. There can be many things that rule our time. Work, friends, meetings, extra-curricular activities and the list can go on.
We are becoming a society that needs to do all and have everything. The everyday things are sending our minds spinning out of control. This precedent has changed how we live. How far can we stretch ourselves until we buckle?
This way of life is not realistic! Something or someone is the sacrifice. Who loses the most? We pray “Dear Lord, Please, help me to get through this crazy week! Amen”. Why can we not see all these distractions as a ploy from the devil to slowly drown us in a sea of destruction.
Our “need” to be a successful person, bring us proof or satisfaction that we are accomplished people. This is a worldview! Not a path that God has called us too…. He wants to be our all in all.
Sometimes our busy lives are used as a tool to keep us from facing the real problems in our lives or relationship’s. It can be a result of leaving our primary responsibilities dangling in the wind.
There are times in our lives where circumstances are out of our hands and that cannot be helped…
Make time for those you Love. It is only then, that you can see what is really going on…. If you are too busy, how will you notice, your loved one is struggling? Your child is hurting? Your spouse is looking for attention in another direction?
Reduce your load! Pay attention to what God wants to show you! Manage your life! Don’t let your life manage you! It says in God’s word: NIV Psalms 115:1 Not to us LORD, not to us but to your name be the glory, because of your love and faithfulness. It’s not about us…
Let us have our eyes fixed on Jesus and what he has given to us. If you feel like your life is overloaded and out of control, take a look at what is pulling you in so many directions… and refocus on where God wants you to be.
This is meant to encourage. I do not want to come across as judgmental. This is just one point of view. We all come from different circumstances.
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I noticed your footnote. I don't think you needed it at all. If you do worry about coming off as preachy or judgmental is to write it in the first person single voice. You did slip at times from we to I (one example is we pray...help me.) If you write it all in the first person, you won't risk coming off as judgmental (at least in my opinion). For example, you could do this instead:
Life and its many paths often make me feel like I'm stumbling through a maze of distractions. Work, friends, meetings, and extra-curricular activities often seem to rule my time.
Society pressures me to do and have it all. The everyday things send my mind spinning out of control.
It's a subtle change, but I think it can make it feel more intimate, something you want to share with just me. You are quite wise, and I can see your passion to share what God has placed on your hearts with others.
The only other red ink I have to offer is use exclamation points and ellipses sparingly. Overuse can be distracting, but even more, your wonderful choice of words do the exclaiming and make me stop and think, not the punctuation.
I believe God has great plans for you, and will use your words to touch others in ways you might never anticipate. Keep writing, read and comment on other challenges, and check out some of FW resources like Jan's Writing Basics and Ann's Grammar Basics on the message boards. You did a great job on this piece and I really enjoyed it.