Break Free From The Past | Previous Challenge Entry

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TITLE: Break Free From The Past | Previous Challenge Entry
By Art Fahy
01/13/22
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One of the most difficult challenges, I had when I became a Christian was to let go of the past. Those bad decisions that were life-changing. For many years, I attempted to change reality in my mind to a fictional scenario. This scenario would make me look better, stronger, wiser or make someone else look less then. I changed the dialogue and incorporated it to what I should have said. The result was always the same nothing changed.

My thoughts would fall on one of three life changing decisions I wanted to change. There was one that stood out. After thirteen months of sobriety, I took a drink. When things became difficult in my life I would ponder on this decision and ask myself why. Why did I take that drink? I changed the dialogue to me saying no to the drink to make myself feel better. In the scene I did feel better but only for a moment. The most challenging time was when I put my head on the pillow at night. When the events of the day ping ponged through my head I would bring up the imaginary scenario to relax myself and feel better. Upon waking in the morning, the past was still the same.

I engaged in this battle for some time always with the same result. It was as if I had a chain shackled to my ankle and a five pound ball on the other end. I was a prisoner. There were times I could beat back the temptation but mostly I succumbed. I felt hopeless. I knew this action was holding me back from growing spiritually. One evening I was going through my bible and came across Proverbs 26:11NKJV “As a dog returns to his own vomit, So a fool repeats his folly.” I thought that’s disgusting but that was me. I was going back to a situation in the past and trying to change it and did it over and over again.

This was a revelation. It was a new beginning for me. The Holy Spirit wasn’t done with me. He led me to Luke 9:62 NKJV But Jesus said to him, “No one, having put his hand to the plow, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God.” The followers of Jesus knew when plowing a field they had to look forward to do their work well. They could not look back. I meditated on this verse and came to realize it would be impossible for me to do God’s will by dwelling on the past.

Isaiah 43:18 The Lord says, “Do not remember the former things, nor consider the things of old.” By not considering the things of old, I am more receptive of discovering what God’s plan is for me. Verse 19 the Lord makes a promise. “Behold, I will do a new thing, Now it shall spring forth; Shall you not know it? I will even make a road in the wilderness And rivers in the desert.”

That road in the wilderness minus the past is smoother and I get to enjoy the journey. Is it always smooth? No. The adversities I face are easier to deal with the help of the Holy Spirit. The rivers in the desert for me is God’s Word. His Word satisfies my thirst. Every day is a new beginning to walk on the road He has set before me. To do His will and to glorify only Him in the present.

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