The Official Writing Challenge
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01/17/06
Really good. What an incredible illustration for that verse. You hit the nail on the head! Bravo.
01/19/06
Great title, great illustration of a "homeless" person's heart. Watch out for the tense shifts toward the end. This one left me sad, which is a good thing; you accomplished your objective. Great message.
Such a real picture of so many lives. I would have like to be shown rather than told, but good points!
01/20/06
I see a 'homeless' heart. A perfect picture not only of discontent but of what is 'missing.' 'If he could only get more money his wife might love him.' Sad, yet true for so many. 'If only' and then they would love me is the cry of men, woman and children. You've made many points - excellent!
You've described something that is unfortunately, all too true. Years ago when struggling with similar issues, I felt God tell me that I could learn to be thankful with all that I had, or else He could take everything away and I could learn to be thankful then. I learnt pretty quickly! LOL.
Thanks once again for your insights. God Bless.
01/21/06
Wow - this really makes you think...
01/21/06
This has an excellent message. Powerful piece. You captured it well, Benji. Since it is so strong, I will pick at one style difference I had. I was distracted by the number of times you said that it still wasn't the home she dreamed of. It got a bit repetitious for me. I know, however, that it needed to be there to drive the point home. And NOTHING can take away from that killer conclusion. Excellent!
All too true for all too many! Wonderfully told, Benji. Thanks so much.
I have known this family. It pulled at my heart. Very well presented.
01/22/06
This is indeed a powerful message. I wonder where such an article could be published ... perhaps with some suitable photos of beautiful homes / trailer homes / happy families / lonely families?

Well done.
Excellent writing! We gave up the large home to have more time together as a family. A smaller house but alot more contentment!