The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
07/13/07
I love your story. What a beautiful testament to the way God works in our lives even when we don't know it. I like how your MC walked in thinking she was not experienced, but found that she did have all the experience she needed. Great job, keep writing.
07/13/07
Experience IS the best teacher! Enjoyable story.
07/14/07
Lovely - and such truth here!Enjoyed this very much.
This was wonderful for me. Thank you for such an encouraging story:)
07/15/07
Great ending!
07/15/07
Great twist at the end!

I'd suggest that you break down your longer paragraphs into shorter chunks, and separate out all your dialogue.

I enjoyed this sweet story.
This is an excellent story for confidence. I like the ending, too.
07/18/07
Great message for moms and employers.
07/18/07
Great story - I wish I could have been a stay-at-home mom. Thanks for sharing this.
Love that ending! What a kicker! Connie sure has the spunk to stick it out. A few tips, in the beginning, use her name instead of "Middle-aged woman" This keeps us close to the story. Also, watch for awkward sentences like "Expertly avoiding stepping" is quite a tongue twister. ^_^ Keep up the good work though.
Raising 13 children would prepare a person for a variety of jobs! Great story. I really liked it. (After raising 13 kids I think I would be too tired to get a job with toddlers.)
Great example of life bringing all the experience we need.