The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Cute. :) I wondered if Barry was "who" I thought!
The plot seemed just a tad disconnected - I had trouble pulling things together. Maybe because I have trouble with dialogue sometimes, knowing who is doing the talking.
Good message though, I liked your point. I want to know the whole story!
I liked the sunset and the surprise about Barry - but the dialogue became bogged down a bit (in my opinion) and I lost interest - perhaps not that long would have done the trick; however, well written.
I agree with the above comments, but the piece was interesting and the ending was a surprise for me with Barry being a dog.
I really enjoyed the way you wove this story. You included so many different aspects of life, from sunsets, to flowers, to our relationship and belief in Christ. Fantastic writting!!
Sorry, I for forgot one comment, I really, really love the way you included Barry!!