The Official Writing Challenge
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This is really cute. Would be a wonderful children's story -- bummer it's a week too soon. :)

I love the POV -- it's a great adventure from the little girl's perspective. Nice job.
Very cute!Love how this is seen through a child's eyes. Oh, if we could only see more through the eyes of the innocent. Keep up the writing. Nice job! God bless your talent.Janice
This so sounds like a little girl. You captured the voice exactly...or did you overhear it!
This is great! You captured the POV and told a delightful story.
Very nicely done from the child's perspective. A thoroughly enjoyable read.