The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 1682 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
This is pretty good! You painted a very interesting character through Hannah. I enjoyed the dialouge between her and Mrs. Mcgrew. Very interesting name and a true message woven through her. ^_^
03/03/07
Good story. I liked the hints of history and the colony here - you didn't overpower us with it, but it was enough to give the setting. Neat image at the end as well.
Enjoyable, interesting read. Good pov.
Great dialogue, and a fine message, too!
03/07/07
LOVE both of your characters' voices. It felt so authentic, so "right for the timeperiod." A few grammar/spelling issues, but nothing major.
03/07/07
I, also, found this to be authentic for the time period. It is also quite interesting to think about daydreaming as serving one of two masters and that we should go with the one in which we can affect change. Fresh insight, here.
03/07/07
What a charming little slice of life! Intriguing characterizations--I really liked Hannah.
I fell in love with little Hannah who so wanted to please the Master. I have been conflicted before, too. I like how she was shown kindness with firmness. Good dialogue!
It's Verna again! I forgot to comment on what a great title that is, as well as a good idea in the story.
This is very original. I could picture Hannah, and the dialogue was right on. Well done.
03/07/07
I enjoy historical fiction. Nicely done.
03/07/07
I enjoyed this. It helps show just how easy it can be to serve two (or more!) masters. Great job.
03/07/07
You grab my attention, held and left me wanting to read more from Hannah and Mrs. McGrew.
I found two errors, I am sure were left to see if anyone notice, Hanna instead of Hannah and sill instead of still.

Thanks for a great read!
Absolutely amazing! A truly great read!!
03/07/07
The historical setting was great. Your dialog, and its wording, combined well with it without being dificult to read. I liked it!
In spite of minor spelling errors, this piece spoke to me on a personal level and I thank you for it. The enemy can use situations over which we have no control to keep our focus distracted from the Lord's work. A confirmation I needed to hear.
03/07/07
Very well written. I liked the authentic-sounding dialog and the characters were well described. A good story, too! Thanks for sharing this.
03/08/07
Great dialogue, definitely felt the time period as I read, and the last line just pierced me. Excellent.
A stitch and a hand toward heaven. A great lesson that even something simple as daydreaming can distract from God. Nice story.
03/08/07
I really enjoyed this story and the characters. The spelling errors didn't distract as much as the missing quotation mark. I needed the message in your story -- Thanks alot. ;-) Great job.