Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Purposefulness (Purpose in Life) (05/25/06)
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TITLE: Finding The Big Picture | Previous Challenge Entry
By Laura Wilkinson
05/27/06 -
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In my freshman year of nursing school, our class was challenged to write a paper on what we wanted out of life. I was only seventeen. Out of thirty-nine entries, thirty-eight agreed on one goal. Jenna, my room-mate, stated the consensual statement well: I’m young and I feel good. I believe I owe myself a life full of fun.
Mrs. Diekman read each paper aloud, not naming any author, so we could have the fun of guessing who had written each paper. I shuddered when she got to mine. The room grew quiet.
As she read, several class members started giggling. Jenna pointed to me. “That’s so you!” she said. And it was. The paper identified me as the author beyond question. My topic? I wanted to know the meaning of life. Fun was fine, but I wanted to dig deeper and have lasting joy.
I thought my career in nursing would reveal my purpose. Or my role as mother and wife. Since I play the piano by ear, I wondered if that gift would shed light on exactly what God had in mind for me. But the purpose of my life remained elusive.
I was 56 years old before I “got it.” That was the year after my mother-in-law, who had lived with us for five years, died of heart and lung problems. It was the year that my boss and I locked horns so badly that I had to take “family leave” to prevent a nervous breakdown. It was the year that my body gave way to stress and I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia – a syndrome that zaps you with pain and saps all your energy. That was the year I earnestly asked, “God, what am I here for?”
For the first time, I stopped pushing the control buttons. They didn’t function any more. Besides, it took too much energy. All I could do was rest and lean on God.
Shortly after, I retired from my job as a teaching nurse. Our sons left home and moved out of state to finish their college degrees and start work. I vividly remember sitting on the couch one evening, weeping, as I told my husband, “I had one decent job in my life – helping to raise the boys. And now it’s over. I’m done. Retired from motherhood. There’s no more purpose to my life. My work is done.” Clearly, I had overlooked the mission of soul-mate to my husband and servant of my Lord.
During a summertime bible-study of Ephesians, I read these words with new insight: “For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them.” (Ephesians 2:10; NASB) Could it be that my purpose was so simple, so obvious that I’d looked right past it all along?
Since I was a teen, I’d been looking for that “special something” that God was calling me for. Had it been there all the while, within arm’s reach? Maybe I’d not seen the big picture.
Some of us are called to do big jobs. But I was not a Moses or an Esther. No. Like you, I have been called to ask God at the beginning of each day, “What do you have in mind today, Lord? How can I bring You glory? How can I fulfill your purposes?”
Since that day – the day when I sat on the couch and gave myself up for dead, I’ve learned not to sit on my hands and wait for the big thing to come along. I’ve noticed the little opportunities that come, moment by moment, just waiting for my response. I now know my missions do no not always come as a shout; some come as a whisper.
Now I know that my purpose is simply to do the will of the One who brought me to this earth in the first place. It is the most rewarding job I’ve ever been offered.
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