The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 384 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
This is a beautiful piece because of the graphic descriptions. Thanks for sharing.
09/15/22
So beautiful. I could relate. I felt it was me there.

Thank you.
09/16/22
You have an amazing ability to paint a real picture with words. This is a comforting reminder to us that we are never alone, but can see God in all His created beauty and work around us. I often sit outside and when I feel a breeze flow over my body it I liken it to God giving me a gentle caress just to remind me He is there. Great work!!
This is a stunning piece. It reminds me of a grown-up version of Good Night Moon. In fact, I think with some tweaks it would make an awesome coffee-table book with beautiful illustrations and a strong message. Instead of trying to find different words for tag lines like yell, ask, spoke use body language to paint a picture for the reader, much like you did with I waved. Be careful of the tense. Writing in the present is difficult and you did slip into the past every once in a while, but that's easy to do and an easy fix. You have a beautiful message, a great take on the topic. If you ever decide to turn this into a coffee-table book and need an editor to help tweak it, let me know and I could help you myself or help you find one. I really like this story. It's one of my favorites for this topic.
09/21/22
Wow!
This was fabulous, I loved it.
Especially about "God" being in everything and everywhere, so true.
This would be a great book for children, I agree with Shann.
Take her up on her offer, she is amazing and spot on with her comments.

Thanks for sharing,
God Bless~
09/22/22
Congratulations!
Congratulations on ranking 2nd overall! I'm doing my Happy Dance for you. This was my favorite this week!
09/22/22
Congratulations!
Well done,
God Bless~
Beautiful- simply beautiful. Congratulations.