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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: WOUND (11/26/20)
When I think of being bullied in elementary school, I get this feeling of bitterness. I know that it was in the past, but I sometimes I can not stop thinking, "Why me." I did not deserve this at all. This boy who was in my class kept punching me in the back, and calling me, "stupid retard." Who was he to talk! All that left in me was a deep wound.

When I entered high school, I was bullied by somebody else because I was the quiet one. I liked this boy, but he punched me a couple of times, and so did this other boy. He punched in the head, and slapped me on the chin. "What did I do to deserve this. I tried to witness about God to them back then, but they did not listen.

One time I was so angry at this boy who bothered me that I threw somebody's binder at his head, and all the papers came out of it. I felt awful about it, and the supply teacher had laughed after the incident took place.

3 years later, I drank alcohol because I did not feel good about myself, and when I attended youth group at my church once a week, I felt that a lot of people did not like me. I felt rejected, but maybe that was only my opinion. I did enjoy the group though, and events such as youth rallies, and conventions.

Right now, I do miss that stuff, and I have some good memories about it. I just have to keep praying about moving forward, and heal completely from as to what had happened in my childhood and youth.
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
12/05/20
You did an awesome job with this mini-testimony. I felt a lump form in my throat before I finished the first line. You grabbed my attention right away and held it to the end.
Just a couple of minor things: Although it's probably the opposite of what your teachers taught, don't be afraid to use contractions. They add authenticity to the MC's voice as well as shortening word count, which would give you more words to add body language, dialog, and the MC's thoughts.
Double check your punctuation rules,
and don't start a sentence with a numeral, but instead, write it out: three.
I really liked your ending. It brought it full-circle. You did an excellent job of writing on topic while delivering a clear message, making this reader stop and think, which is always a good thing. You have a lot of talent and potential. I'm eager to read more of your work and hope you never stop writing these powerful piece that many need to hear.
Barbara Culler 
12/10/20
I remember in Jr. high school that a boy tormented me so much, I reached my breaking point. I stabbed him in the leg with a freshly sharpened pencil. He left me alone after that!