The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 502 times
Member Comments
I loved this story. What a courageous young lady to continue in the face of adversity! Wow. Nicely done, and God was definitely there, He gave you the ability to carry on.

Great job. Thanks.

God bless~
Oh this is such a touching story. You evoked a whole bunch of emotions from me. I love your MC and you did a nice job of showing her personality to the reader.

Some of your sentences are just a tad awkward. For example this one caused me to stumble a bit: bullying second graders
Instead maybe second grade bully would have flowed better. A good suggestion is to have someone read your story out loud, if they stumble, you may want to restructure that sentence.

When I got to the part about the MC pulling up her skirt and keep playing I wanted to stand up and cheer. It's easy to think it's funny as long as you're not the one with the skirt on the floor. I think this is a beautiful example and you really touched my heart. Nice job.
I remember in 4th grade my class did a play called 'Kinderella,' a different view of Cinderella. I played the step- mother and wore my mother's dress and shawl that she still had from the 60's. My mom had given me her brooch to wear also, that I put on the shawl to keep it in place, but during the play I had to take the shawl off as part of the act but the brooch wouldn't budge. I stood there, in front of everyone, trying my hardest to get the pin to come out but it wouldn't. I was so embarrassed but I had to continue on.

Very good story. I can relate on many levels.

God bless!
Thanks for sharing your story. I'm also thankful that you had on a slip. If that happened today who knows what would happen. I often think undergarments are out of fashion. Good job.
Congratulations on holding your poise when an episode like that could have sown the seeds of "skirtzophrenia" in later life. Terrific descriptions all the way through.
Good for you to not run away. And losing your veil? Worse things can happen in life. You made me laugh. Thank you.
The audience laughed,but people enjoy a good laugh and when it comes to children the laughter is not to ridicule, but to enjoy the moment. I like the phrase "like bullying second graders" better than the one suggested by another reviewer. It reads as being more original and gives life to how you felt as a child. Keep up the good work in your writing.