The Official Writing Challenge
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How sad for all family members involved when addictions of any sort break people up. Thank God for the family members who have the courage to help the hurting. Thank you for your story. God bless you.
04/25/08
What a wonderful story!! Hearing Sophia's thoughts like that added sooooo much, and it was the perfect touch. Very well done!!
04/27/08
Good writing touching a very realistic situation for too many people. From a reader's angle I think you give away too much at times with Jenny's words, such as:
"Mommy said I was always in the way" & the part about Mommy not cooking meals for days. I think this is implied in her initial questions, and perhaps can be better touched upon in Sophia's thoughts. Make the reader ponder why a scared six year old is asking her aunt such questions.

Keep sharing such good stories.
04/28/08
I think you did a great job with the two distinct voices in this piece. I could hear them talking in my head as I read this. You made them come alive. Beautiful story.
04/28/08
Nice story, and you did a good job with the voice of the little girl. Too often writers make the mistake of making children seem older or wiser than their years. You got it just right.
04/28/08
Well done. To me the story begs at least two more stories—one to describe how all this mess started and another to tell us how Natalie's personal problems got resolved. Is there a short story here?
04/28/08
This was awesome...I have seen several incidents like this one play out, and you desribed the emotions of both very well. Great job!
04/28/08
This was really great! I felt so hopeful for Jenny at the end. Realistic dialogue and thought process too.
Great effort here, especially with a tough and very real topic. Keep up the good words.
Everything in this story fit together nicely. The dialogue between the characters, the thoughts of the woman, and the way that the subject matter was discussed were all handled realistically.

While it is sad that these types of things happen in real life, it is nice when God puts a special person in the life of a child to give them the love that the parents are unable to give.

Thank you for sharing. I really enjoyed this.
04/28/08
This is a wonderful story of love in action. I agree with Jason about some things being better coming from an adult's thoughts than the child's words. That is minor compared to the value of what your story tells. Well done.
04/28/08
What a wonderful aunt, and a sweet little niece. Very nicely done, Tracy.
04/29/08
Love this story. I could picture the conversation taking place. The dialogue was excellent. Very good job with the topic.
What a mixture of sadness and hope... and all too true to life. But I get the feeling both Jenny and her mother will be fine in the long run, with someone as wise and caring as Sophie in their lives.