The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
04/12/18
Well written and very true. Keep on writing.
You picked some great Scripture to help make your point. For me personally, it felt a tad preachy. I'd love to see some real life experiences to help support the verses. I can see how you were trying to include the topic in the piece. I often wonder how God feels or what makes him sad or angry so I could relate to that as well. Nicely done.
04/13/18
A lot of great instruction. I, as Shann, would have liked to have seen you use these well thought out scriptural points in action. Show us how someone misinterpretes scripture. You have the ability to write well. Use it to touch the soul of your reader. God less.
Nice job. Keep writing. You are good at it. Try to brush up a little more on your grammar, though. But other than that, keep on trucking!
04/13/18
This was a bit too "preachy".

I found myself skipping over some parts because I sensed a harsh tone.
I thought I read two sentences that needed the word "it" to make it more readable.

The word annoyed by be too lightly applied to God. When he will have to say: "Get away from me. I never knew you." because of the way we have lived that is more than just a little annoyed. He is so disgusted and pained with our lives he judges us to be unworthy of his heaven he has made for the faithful. If God is a little "annoyed" with us, he may send us on our way even if we think we should be going to heaven.

Keep us thinking as you write.
04/16/18
I love your style, you engage your readers with scriptural references, and ultimately a great message peppered throughout the entry.

Well done,

Keep shining your light

BLessings~
I have to say that God is probably annoyed with me most of the time. Just saying.
04/17/18
Loopholes, excuses, and twisting; sounds a bit like spiritual calisthenics! I expect I've been a cause of annoyance to the Lord more than I care to admit! Pulling a bit of story into this might smooth it some without taking from the very good points you have made.
Congratulations on your HC! Keep writing, you're doing great. Happy Dance!