The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
06/26/06
I like your line about forgetting something like a liver or kidney. Good message with just a hint of humor in spots. Nicely done.
Thanks for this wonderful testimony to His faithfulness to transform your thinking! It's clear you have a good command of words, and a heart to exhort others to higher faith.

As I read this, I felt your message could be strongest in the form of a story. Your readers need to connect with you emotionally in order to best receive the lesson. Dialogue, action, thoughts--all can be used to show your message, rather than simply state it--although you stated it well! I was drawn in by your mention of some disappointment in your career. That might be a great place to start from. Have fun with this--I'll look forward to seeing more of your pieces!