The Official Writing Challenge
BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN
INSTRUCTIONS
how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level
ENTRIES
submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners
Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.


TRUST JESUS TODAY

  • Share
  • how it works
  • Submit
Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Break (02/06/06)
PIECES MADE BY MAN

The wind whipped her brown hair around her face as she rode in her new car. “What a glorious day!” she thought as she rode down the highway. She began to think of all the things that she had accomplished—a loving husband, two sons (although she worried quite a bit about one of them, but he would be alright soon), a small brick home but fine for her, and a good job doing what she loved to do. “Yes, I worked hard for all this.” she thought. I’ve stayed up late and worked hard through college, have given every second either to my home, my family, or my sons. Yes, life is good, and I know I deserve every bit of it.”

I remember being that young woman, and how many times I could only barely squeeze in a church attendance and really never involved enough to show concern and love by cards or calling or actually praying everyday. Everything was mine and I dearly cared about it all.

Now, as I sit with my graying strands of my hair blowing in the same wind, but in a different car, I realize how much time I have wasted in my life in not being in fellowship with the God and the only reason for being—being his child. The clock in the car seemed to echo my thoughts. God does great things and controls everything. “Yes,” I now admit, “My Lord, you mean it when you say: ‘Seek me first and everything else will be added to you.’ I added everything else first and not you, and now I am seeking.”

A momentary flash of a fine son lying in a coffin still swollen from losing his horrible battle with cancer filled her eyes with tears.

“Oh, Lord, how can I cope with this? I have been so far from you for so long and needlessly doing everything my way. I ask with all my being—please, Lord, help me to understand your great plan and accept you as being in control of everything. I cannot make my son live again. I cannot go back in time and give you more time. I cannot go and make right all my past selfish mistakes. Still I know you love me dearly and I know you loved my son dearly. Help me to accept and still love you—despite my very being crying out to protest my own wrongs and the inevitableness of death.”

She dried her tears with her kleenex, and suddenly an imaginary arm reached around her shoulders and hugged her tight.

“My little daughter,” said a kind, still distant, but close whisper,” I am still here. Your son has always been mine and he now is rejoicing in heaven. You can still serve me. Only through your brokenness have you given me the right to fully claim you as my real daughter. Keep searching and praying and asking, and I will be there. Let me guide this time and I’ll lead you straight into heaven into joy with me and all my saints.”

Broken? Pieces made by man will always be broken. Pieces remolded by the potter will be more beautiful and more used.
The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be right now. CLICK HERE

JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.
This article has been read 1008 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Nina Phillips
02/13/06
Very touching, and what a true message. Hope we don't wait so long to receive it. God bless ya, littlelight
Zac James
02/13/06
This was very well written. I believe that every good work of literature should have a line that grabs the reader, and that line was "I added these things to you and now I am seeking."

Well done :).
Anna Johnson
02/14/06
I agree with the others -- a very touching and well-written story. I think most of us with gray hair can relate, but it's never too late with the Lord! Great job!
Jessica Schmit
02/14/06
This was a well written article. I enjoyed the line,"Now, as I sit with my graying strands of my hair blowing in the same wind, but in a different car," it was a very good transition. Your messege was very clear and the story was well written, but I felt your last few lines were a bit out of place. As if you had to put them there in order to keep in line with the topic. Still, a very well written peice. Good job!
Delores McCarter
02/14/06
I love this piece! Your emotions and visual imagery is right on target. As for the topic, however, I have to agree with Jessica. Your conclusion needs a little more balance. To solve that, you could have referred to specific "pieces" throughout your text. For example, the relationship with Christ that was severed...a broken piece. The death of a son was another piece broken. That would tie in with your topic as well as balance your entire writing "piece" (pun intended) as a whole. That being said, I think that after tweaking this piece a little, your should add it to your portfolio for submission to a Christian Women's magazine. Also, I feel strongly that you should consider moving up a level or two. You are definately NOT a beginner! Keep on keeping on. I look forward to seeing more of your work. (smile)
Mary Alice Bowles
02/15/06
I enjoyed your article very much. It is the type of writing that belongs in a higher level! Great job.