The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
08/04/16
Just for future reference, you need to leave some white space. This is harder to read. But you put a lot of work into it. Keep up the good work.
I did not feel that your opening was strong enough or as well connected to the body of your material.

I did like your Bible references and how you pointed out that god's word has a solution for every situation. Not that is eerie.