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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: CHILL (10/29/15)
"Wow!lovely" whispered my heart when I heard the little penguin flapping it's wings.I felt the day was special when I saw the same penguin staring at me."Excuse me mam!" Was a huge disturbing moment but "would you like to go in and see them"made me to forget the disturbance. Young Pretty lady in white outfit with a tag "Zoo Assistant" made me nod my head.She slowly opened the door and there came a gushing and chill breeze which pierced through my veins.Joyfully but slowly moved my leg to their paradise. "Oh God!It is so chill here.How do they survive?"."They need this chillness my child! Not you" came an reply from their creator. I smiled to myself and to the lady who bought me in.i tried seeing the one which stared at me but how silly am I?.God calls and knows everyone by name,How can I?.Again I smiled
"Do you want me to take a pic for you"
"Sure,but I need you also to be with me".I took my mobile and focused the flappers to be behind us and as a trend, took a selfie.

"Are you ok mam?" "Did you check the pulse?""Where are the paramedics?"Even though I couldn't ask or move I understood my special day ended with the seizures".
I saw the white outfit again but this time it was a HE asking the lady "What happened young lady?How did she fall?"
"I don't know sir.She clicked a picture with me and the next moment..."There were tears.I wanted to rise and comfort her but a small movement from me needed an hour.
"let's take her out.its very chill here and I don't want her to have another jerk".
"1..2..3"they picked me and put me in the stretcher and rolled me away.I could hear the squeaky sound of the wheels and this time,there was no gentle push on the door.Again the gushing chill breeze pierced through my veins.But this time, it was the pain whispered "it's just for a moment ".
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Larry Whittington
11/07/15
It sounds like this could be a true to life situation. Those stories like this might take a brave soul to write it and publish it. Nice work.

There is a preview button on the page you can go into and see what your writing looks like. If it looks OK to you, then you can click on the print or post button. The spaces after the periods were what I saw mostly.

Nice story. Well written.
Donna Powers
11/10/15
I liked the enthusiasm in the beginning of the story. You definitely made us sympathize with the narrator, in the end. Keep writing!
Shiny Lijo
11/11/15
Thanks for the encouragement!