Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Surprised (09/06/07)
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TITLE: The 911 CALL | Previous Challenge Entry
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09/13/07 -
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I wanted to see who it was but I had to protect the kids, moving as quietly as I could I picked the phone up off the nightstand dialing 911.
“He’s in the kitchen, going through all the drawers, please hurry”. I was getting hysterical and yet remembering to whisper. I huddled in my bed, listening as the next drawer was opened.
“Please he’ll kill us. I have large knifes in the kitchen. My three children are asleep in their beds.”
“Miss, the police are on the way, stay on the line with me and try not to talk.” The dispatch officer said.
Was she a lunatic, my house has been invaded; someone is helping themselves to things in my kitchen. On the other side of my room was the laundry room and than my kitchen.
It took less than three minutes before the dispatcher started talking to me again.
“Miss I am going to switch you to the officers that are outside your house now.”
Thank God my head was beginning to pound my heart was beating so hard I could hardly breathe.
“O. K. miss, we will need you to let us in, your doors are all locked.” The police officer said.
Was he nuts? To let him in the back door, I had to go into the kitchen. If I let him in the front door I could be seen from the kitchen.
“I can’t!” I cried
“Miss I mean Vicky I know you can do this if you unlock the door we walk right in and arrest him you will be perfectly safe. We have our guns out ready to take him just unlock the door.”
“I can’t I’m too scared.”
“Yes, you can, put the phone down and go unlock the door I’m right there waiting. We can see you and him, just come around the corner and unlock the door.”
“O. K. just please hurry.
Rounding the corner my heart now in my throat, I surprised my husband looking for a battery for his walkman.
“What are you doing here?” I screamed.
“What do you mean I live here,” he asked
“This is the police open the door” they shouted. There beating at the door caused my husband to look at me like I lost my mind.
Unlocking the door the police charged into the room, “Put your hands in the air,” they shouted to my surprised husband.
“What is going on.” He demanded.
“Mrs. Cody do you know this man?”
“What are you doing home? I screamed.
“I got off early” he replied
By this time the police are chuckling beneath their hands and turning so we can’t see their faces. One of the officers asked my husband for ID to prove who he was.
Looking at me, my heart now reflected in my surprised face, they asked if everything was alright now.
“Yes umm, thank-you” I murmured
Tipping their hats to my still surprised husband, they slipped out the back door. The chuckles could be heard all the way down the long driveway.
Needless to say I have never lived this down. My husband even after twenty years, announces his entrance to any household.
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There were a number of comma faults here--some comma splices which create run-on sentences, and some sentences missing needed commas. Something to brush up on, perhaps?
I loved reading that this is now a piece of family lore, and that it happened 20 years ago and is still laughed about. Priceless!