The Desires of the Wicked | Previous Challenge Entry

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TITLE: The Desires of the Wicked | Previous Challenge Entry
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01/20/05
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Once upon a time there was a wicked, wicked woman. Her name was Jezebel. Jezebel lived with the King of Israel, Ahab. King Ahab was known as a very wicked King. But, his queen was much more wicked than he. One
Day he was walking around and spotted a nice piece of land right next to his palace. He wanted that land so bad, but the man who owned it refused to sell it to him. So, great King Ahab rolled up in a ball on his bed and refused to eat his din-dins. Wicked Queen Jezebel demanded to know what was wrong with Ahab. He told her that Naboth refused to sell him his vineyard and he wanted it to grow vegetables. (Because King Ahab was a nutritious type of
guy.) Jezebel shrieks, “Let me get this right? You are bawling like a baby because this Naboth won’t ‘SELL’ you his stinking vineyard?” Old Ahab
nods. Jezebel gets right into his face and hisses, “Is this how you act as King? Get up, right now, go get something to eat, and watch how it’s done!”

Wicked Jezebel set up a sting in which she got a couple of crooks to sit
beside poor Naboth and accuse him of blasphemy and treason. Instantly
he was taken out and stoned to death. As soon as King Ahab heard that
Naboth was dead he jumped up out of bed and ran and took possession
of the vineyard. There he was ripping out generations of vines and digging
in his precious veggies. But! One must ask, was he alone in his new veggie
garden? No, he was not. Un-be-known to him God was watching. As he
happily dug and planted in the blood stained land. God was watching. God
sent His prophet Elijah, to speak a curse on Ahab and his household:
Dogs will devour Jezebel by the wall of Jezreel. Dogs will eat those belonging to
Ahab.

One day, during a battle
someone ‘randomly’ managed to shoot an arrow between the sections of Ahab’s armor. He died and the dogs licked up his blood just as had been prophesied. Wicked Queen Jezebel managed to skulk around town for another while but her day came too. After dolling herself
Up (painting her face) and doing her hair, she went to the window to see
the new King coming into town. She was hanging out of the window cursing Jehu, the new King of Israel when three of her eunuchs grabbed her by the feet and tipped her out of the window. By the time the street cleaners were sent to pick up her body there was only a couple of limbs left. The dogs had eaten her up.

And so the moral of the story has to be, do not desire your neighbor’s goods.

(476 words)

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