Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Feel (emotions) (08/26/10)
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TITLE: Resistance | Previous Challenge Entry
By Carole Robishaw
09/02/10 -
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"What do you mean, no. How can you just say no?"
"I just don't want to, that's how."
"You don't want to. Okay, I understand that. I guess it's going to get a little unpleasant around here, then."
"What does that mean?"
"Well, I don't really want to do the laundry, pick up after you, or wash the dishes. So I just won't do them anymore."
"That's not the same thing! You're asking me to spend an entire day with your co-workers. People I don't even know and have nothing in common with. Just what am I supposed to do all day? Paste on this fake smile and stand there like an idiot."
Hmmm, don't think I should answer that one. "I do a lot of things for you that I don't want to, you can spend a few hours doing this for me, please?"
She turned her big, glistening, baby-blues on him. Knowing he couldn't possibly resist her. I know it's not really fair playing the poor me card, but sometimes it's the only thing that works. Besides, it's been a while, have to keep my feminine wiles muscles tuned up.
Jeff moaned, "Yeah, okay, so what do I wear?"
Sherry turned away, hiding her grin, as she reached into the closet for his shirt.
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Jeff dropped into the lawn chair, his chest was heaving and sweat was running down his face. He tipped his head back and finished off the entire glass of tea. "Oh man, did I need that!"
Sherry watched from the other side of the patio as Jeff joked with Tom about the volleyball game they had just played. Hmm, so, should I be glad his feelings about being here today have changed or worried about the fact that he just beat the pants off my boss? Am I going to spend the next few days listening to Jeff gloat and Tom rationalize or are they going to be able to let it go and remember that it was just a game?
Jeff looked up, caught her eye, and winked. Oh, brother. I never should have pushed him to come; I am going to really regret this.
Sherry walked over to stand next to Jeff.
"Listen, I've got to go spend some time with my wife right now, and I want to tell her about our conversation. I think she is going to be very pleased." Tom turned towards her. "Sherry, can't tell you how good it was to get to spend some time with Jeff. I think this was exactly what I needed right now." Tom walked away, looking thoughtful.
"What was that all about?"
"Later, Babe, don't think we should talk about it right now."
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"Okay, so give. What was Tom talking about?"
Jeff reached over and turned the car radio off. "Well, it seems that Tom has been paying close attention to how you react when things get crazy at work, how you seem to be able to keep your feelings under control and get the job done, when everybody else is pulling their hair out. Problem is, he couldn't ever find a way to ask you about it. So, somehow, it came up while we were waiting our turn to play. I explained about how you used to have a hair trigger when it came to self control, but then you changed. I told him about our couples Bible study, and how we all practice what we learn. He said that sounds exactly like what he and his wife have been looking for."
Sherry's eyes were glistening as she listened to Jeff. She had never known him to tell anybody about church or God. It had almost been as if he was ashamed of it, like it was unmanly or something to enjoy going to church and studying the Bible.
Jeff was quiet for several minutes. "Babe, have I told you today how much I love you?"
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Make sure you start a new paragraph when a new person is talking.
Isn't it wonderful how God works His magic? You definitely showed how He can turn something ordinary into something wonderful.
You have a feel for dialogue (it's believable) and did a good job with the setting. Nice job, keep writing!