The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
11/17/06
Great job of characterization on both main characters - and I loved the lifeguard's change of heart - it was definitely believable. Great job.
I like your take on the topic and how well rounded your characters are. Well done! btw-I could smell the coconut lotion.
11/20/06
Nice comment on human reaction and change of heart. I could picture the whole event. Thanks for sharing.
11/20/06
Very nice--you wrote both characters in a very realistic way. Lovely ending.
11/20/06
This was a great! It flowed very well, and I kept wondering where it was heading. You caught me pleasantly off guard at the end with such a simple, yet very sweet slice-of-life story.
11/21/06
I loved this story! Vivid, beautiful description and dialog--I felt as though I were there and knew the characters. I've always loved stories about people who are mentally challenged and how others respond to someone who is different. I really appreciated the story's ending, when Mark began to care about Daniel as a person!
11/21/06
This was great. I also appreciate stories with people with disabilities as the main characters. I liked the twist at the end also. Great job.