Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Prosperity (05/11/06)
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TITLE: For Better Or Worse | Previous Challenge Entry
By Edy T Johnson
05/14/06 -
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There is nothing so annoying, when I’m mad as a wet hen, than to have a husband grinning , as if I’m joking! He just stares at me, until he can no longer restrain himself. A little smile gets past his resolve and his stifled chuckling begins to explode into his funny laugh, while my squawking goes into crescendo fortissimo.
I’ve always had a short fuse. I’m usually not one to simmer and stew. I blow up, but it’s quickly over. But, that sudden flare sends alarms even to me. Then I’m meek, I can’t believe I lost it again, and I’m sorry as can be.
I believe in being honest about my feelings. I don’t hide the abundance of my emotions. I’m transparent to a fault, it’s just the way I am. If I love you, you’ll know it! [If I can’t stand you, I’ll stay away.] No mystery about it, what you see is what you get! But, I keep trying to be better.
When I was a teenager, my mom told me I needed to learn to be more mysterious (like she was, and like my younger sister, she said)! She actually told me, “Nobody ever has to wonder what’s going on inside YOUR head. It’s always written all over your face! You’re as plain as an old meatball!”
Well, that was a startling assessment. I said nothing, but I already had it figured out that she was wrong. Folks need to know somebody loves them, or somebody is angry with them. Or, whatever. I never was one to play games, like some sneaky women. Probably why marriage dangled just out of my reach all those yearning years. It sure was beyond my doing when I beat the odds for somebody in my age bracket finally getting married for the first time. My sweetheart was so delighted to find me, so thankful in his widowhood that he wouldn’t have to spend the rest of his life alone, after all, that he was, thankfully, oblivious to all my faults. Without that type of blindness, I’m afraid I’d still be single. Or, horrors! married in misery.
So, how did I finally find the one who would, with all his earthly goods, me endow? How did a crab like me get a man so sweet and mild? He’s only raised his voice a couple times in all the years we’ve been married, although I certainly would have thought I deserved his wrath a lot more often. Instead, the big teddy bear just leaves for awhile. When I settle down and call him, he claims he checked out because he was scared of me! Isn’t that just awful? I don’t want to be scary! I’d much rather be sweet and serene!
Well, I didn’t “find” him, and I didn’t “get” him. I finally gave up, having barked up too many wrong trees over the years. And then, SURPRISE! God had something up His sleeve, after all, and I could hardly believe my good fortune. What a jewel, what a gift He gave me when I allowed Him to do the picking!
Someday, I’ll have to write a poem for my husband. I’ll confess all the above in rhyming, metered lines, just for him. And, I’ll have to end it with the words:
“So, what’s the moral of this verse?
I got you for Better, and you got me for Worse!”
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I got you for Better, and you got me for Worse!”
Watch your punctuation. You are a good writer and you have a wonderful voice. With a little tightening this would be a gem.
'...while my squawking goes into crescendo fortissimo.' Perfect - besides your perfect ending! Loved this!
Just a suggestion for turbo-charging your opening sentence. Why not start out with "madder than a wet hen?" It just seems easier for the reader to follow if you keep the actions in their chronological sequence.
But that's only a nitpick...the whole thing is delightful, and I do hope you employ your rare gifting to create the poem!