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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Drip (04/25/13)

TITLE: Decision Maker
By
04/29/13


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Decision Maker

The first drip began to change his mind.
It had been a long year since the Welsh churchyard;
he’d thought he could manage alone.

The children had gone back over the border;
they had their families
safe in the sunshine beyond the Severn.

Many times through the damp years
he’d patched and thatched the wormy timbers,
but now,
beside the old pan on the hearth,
every drip fell,
softly menacing,
measuring his loneliness,
while there beyond the misted pane,
brambles reached out over the old cabbages,
tentacles,
reclaiming their wild inheritance.

Next summer,
the children took him back,
cared for and loved,
safe with his family beyond the Severn,
his loneliness abandoned to the ruin in its narrow valley
beside the tumbling Marlais.

Interested to see, a later generation returned.
The ash roots clasping the last corner of the cottage wall;
young sycamore and thorn shrouding the remnants of yard and barn;
their grandparents’ dream,
cold under the trees that dripped year by year,
and the slow moss
advancing over the fallen stones.


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This article has been read 126 times
Member Comments
Member Date
dub W05/07/13
I adore free verse and this is no exception until the shift in the 4th stanza "Next summer..." It didn't fit, something was missing leading into it. Keep writing, you have much to share.
Fiona Stevenson05/08/13
Every poem should paint a picture: your poem takes us to four pictures on the wall of a family life, from the death of a spouse to the death of a home, a dream. There is a sadness, but there is also the sunshine and continuance (beyond the Severn), drawing the reader from one picture to another. Thank you. And God bless you.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 05/09/13
This is an intense piece. Your description grabbed my heart. Nice job.