The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
10/19/12
Not many stories in here affect me emotionally but tears welled up when I read this one. Well written and moving!

Colin (Gold Member)
This is a beautiful story. You did a wonderful job of showing in the beginning, I could feel the tension as they waited for the test results. Later on there was a bit more telling like the girls were delighted. Instead if you could show their actions with something like The girls giggled and made funny faces for their little brother. But I also know that sometimes with such a limited word count you have to tell instead of show. You did an outstanding word of showing the topic without using the word blessed which can be quite difficult. You held my attention from beginning to end and I felt honored to have a glimpse into Corey"s (and kids like Corey) life.
10/22/12
What a blessing this boy is to his parents. You showed that very well. Your jump from his birth to the present, contained an entire childhood of blessings within it.
10/23/12
This is wonderful. I knew a young man named Daniel much like Corey..He was a delight to know. You have captured that sentiment in your story so well. Thanks for this excellent writing!

God Bless, Lynn
10/25/12
Oh my, this touched me and gripped my heart. Beautiful and moving. Thank you so much for sharing.

God Bless~
Congratulations for placing second in level one and 16 overall!