Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Pigs Might Fly (10/31/13)
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TITLE: Jesus, the Greater Yes! | Previous Challenge Entry
By Richard Hicks
11/06/13 -
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“You have him just where you want him -- he is going to sell out; he can’t handle the pain and misery much longer. He is emotionally as well as physically being tortured,” snickered another of his cohorts.
“Jesus of Nazareth is going to his death this day and nothing can stand in my way,” proclaimed the wicked ruler of darkness.
“We love and trust you Oh Great Lucifer, proclaimed the head demon, as myriads of demons surrounded the dark lord. We will finally be eternally free from his torment; nothing can stand in our way to rid us of this so called man of god with his radical claims, he ranted on.”
"The ‘spirit of suffering’ has done well in pouring all of its torment on this supposed messiah,” said the dark one.
“The king of the Jews is in death’s grasp and it is not possible for him to get out of this. He will be dead soon and has been stripped of all power, I now will have complete control. This Jesus always bragged that He would never die, and that those who believed in him would live with him eternally. Where is his so called father now? He is nowhere, and no one is going to rescue him;" taunted the great Lucifer puffed full of pride.
Every demon rose up in one accord chanting, cackling and praising Lucifer as a putrid smell arose like that of burning, gangrenous flesh into the regions of hell.
”Jesus will now be subject to us this day,” the demons sang with their song.
On a hill far away the roman soldiers hung Jesus of Nazareth on a cross. He was tortured and abused physically, mentally, and emotionally; yet He remained strong for the ‘hope of mankind’ was on His mind. His mission was predestined long ago for He was the Savior of the world. The very Son of God lay stretched upon the wooden cross of Calvary to die for sins he had not committed, as He carried their weight with incredible love. Great drops of blood stained the wooden cross as He struggled with every breath.
Suddenly Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Father why have you forsaken me?”
“Listen to his cries, his god has forsaken him,” Satan proclaimed to all who were in hell.
But then something totally miraculous happened which the devil in all of his wildest schemes did not foresee. The minute Jesus bowed his head and died, the Father began right then to rescue His Son from the jaws of death. The veil in the ‘Most Holy Place’ was rent in two from top to bottom; there was a violent earthquake and many walked out of their graves.
“How can this be, this is impossible? No one will believe it. My plan to take over has been thwarted all over again,” wailed Satan in utter defeat.
“All of this time how could I not have known God’s plan and purpose had been set into motion? I thought Jesus would be in my grasp forever because of this very well organized demise,” Satan fumed.
On a bright early morning Mary Magdalene and Mary the mother of James were gathered around the open tomb, and an angel of the Lord appeared before them.
“He has risen from the dead, go and tell the good news to His disciples,” rejoiced the Angel.
Jesus appeared to them in bodily form as they were talking amongst themselves that day, for yes, He had been truly resurrected. The grave and hell couldn’t hold the true Son of God! Jesus then ascended to the right hand of His Holy Father where He reigns today ever making intercession for you and me.
With all that seems impossible in your life, know that God is the author of all seeming impossibilities. If God raised Jesus from the dead He can also raise our mortal bodies by His same Spirit that is within us, making us all fly heaven-ward toward our eternal home.
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I love stories about our Lord and Savior.
O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory? (1 Corinthians 15:55 KJV)
WEll done!
God bless~
This is an illustration of what Gen. 3:15 says.
Good creative writing. Good conversations going on.
I noticed some minor punctuation errors that a good proofreader would catch. Also instead of using taglines like he said or he yelled, switch it up with narrative lines like this: "Everything is going just as planned, dear Master." One of his minions rubbed his hands together and cackled as he maneuvered to get closer to Satan.
I tried to paint a picture while letting the reader know who was speaking. I also capitalized the M in Master because it was being used as a name.
You did an excellent job of writing on topic. It was fresh, intriguing, and creative. Your message comes through loud and clear. You brought this story to life and made me stop and really think. That's a sign of good writing.
If you haven't checked out Jan's Writing Basics on the message boards, I'd encourage you to do so. Jan gives great tips for the beginner writer as well as the master. She is diligent about responding to everyone who posts on her thread. God bless.
My ONLY suggestion would have been to go back to Satan and the demons at the moment of the resurrection.
Great job on this. I enjoyed it!