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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Expose (08/22/13)
Recently we were blessed to be in the right place at the right time when we were introduced to a couple who I feel was brought into our lives by God. They had noticed our dogs while we were attending Mass in the majestic, sunlit setting of Glacier Nat'l. Park. The next day, my husband and I were returning back to our RV from walking our two husky pups when a gentleman approached us and asked if these were the same dogs he had seen the day before. Go figure, their 5th wheel was directly across from ours in the campground!
After commenting on mutual likes and hobbies we realized we had a few things in common, so we made it a point to seek each other's company later that night. The guys talked about their rigs and problems they encounter on the road. Carolyn and I found solace in a strong sense of faith, music and writing. Learning that she loved playing the harp, I was in awe of her enthusiasm and prodded her to play for us. Her talent, coming late in her life, is shared by comforting many folks enduring painful cancer treatments and hospice patients grateful for the soothing sounds created by her talent and her instrument.
She could hardly contain herself after learning that I liked to write and she immediately fetched her IPod to show me this website. Needless to say, I was ecstatic to discover FaithWriters and eager to get started and become involved with others who enjoy writing as well. Not only had I often wanted to share my thoughts and words but hoped to get more help and obtain experience through a structured group such as this. She was so gracious, taking her time to explain how the site operates and offering her email address in case I needed additional help to get started.
This was but yet just another example of God's way of bringing just the right people into your life when you really need them. Unfortunate for us the couple was gone the next morning, returning to their home, their friends and their lives. Just when I thought my gift was buried, it was outted in the great outdoors.
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Member Comments
Member
Date
C D Swanson 
08/30/13
Wow - Yes, God plans all or our steps...no such thing as a coincident with the Lord.

I really enjoyed hearing about your trip. I was impressed about the lady with the harp playing and soothing the cancer patients. It put me in mind of David soothing Saul. A harp is so relaxing I love them.

So glad you've found us (or should I say God brought you to us!)--Thanks for sharing your encounter. I look forward to reading more of your entries.

God bless~
Larry Whittington
08/31/13
As I read your first sentence, I put a period after the word "time" and started the next sentence with the word "we". It says the same thing but put a little more "punch" in your opening.

Personal stories are sometimes the best way to start writing. That is the way we used to do it in school.

Well put together. Keep it up.
Virgil Youngblood 
09/03/13
The title drew me in and the story did not disappoint. Adding white space between paragraphs will be appreciated by readers, and make your writing easier to read. I look forward to reading your future submissions. Welcome to FaithWriters.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
09/06/13
This is a nice piece. I really enjoy hearing about "coincidences" like this. It has God's fingerprints all over the situation and I am delighted that you found your way to FW! For me, FW has been an answer to many prayers. Health problems often keep me homebound, but I'm delighted that my FW family is just a mere click away.

Some of your sentences could use a bit of tightening. For example take your opening line, just by switching some words about you can have a tighter sentence: Recently, God blessed my husband and me by allowing strangers to become an answer to my prayers.
Though it's not perfect, it hopefully it sets up a sense of suspense that would pull the reader into the story. A conflict is introduced by the words answered my prayer. It's important, even in nonfiction to have a conflict or a strong message to draw the reader in. You also may want to double space between paragraphs to allow the reader that all important white space.

I'm excited that you found FW and took the plunge by entering the challenge. Writing on topic is one of the hardest parts of this challenge. You kind of bring it in at the end, but eventually you want to get to the point that people could guess the topic even if they didn't know it. It's not always easy to do. For me, I've found by reading and commenting on as many stories as I can, I discover what works for me or what I might change and then can apply it to my own work.

I think you did a wonderful job of showing your passion for writing and your love for God. This is a great foundation of a compelling message. God does wonderful miracles through ordinary everyday type people. I could really feel that as I read your words.

I'm glad that your neighbors recognized your dogs. It's also pretty amazing how God uses all of his creatures to glorify His name.

If you haven't visited the message boards yet, I'd encourage you to check out the forums. You'll want to start in the Newbie Nook, then maybe FAQ. Another great stop is Jan's Writing Basics. She has several threads about how to help writers with a variety of things. Lastly, Congratulations for ranking 9th your level! (The highest rankings can be found on the message boards.)