The Official Writing Challenge
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Wow this story is so intense. You do a wonderful job of building the suspense and making me want to keep reading. The conflict is evident immediately and I found myself wanting to reach out and hold the girl.

You have a few errors that a good proofreader would help you catch like some missing punctuation and remember the punctuation goes inside of the quotation marks.

This is a difficult story to read because I know somewhere a child has those thoughts running through her head right now. You did an incredible job of voicing the girl's thoughts. I can tell that this subject is something you are passionate about bringing to the attention of others. This story will touch many and maybe even save a child somewhere. Nice job.
05/27/13
Oh wow. You brought tears to my eyes. So moving and sad - but with that hope at the end. Thanks so much for sharing.
05/27/13
Oh my heart hurt so much reading this powerful and overwhelming story. I wanted to rescue this young child, but knew that Jesus would be the ultimate "Savior"-

The reality of this story is so prolific in its content that it is at once sobering and jarring...knowing this is happening somewhere in the world, every second of the day.

Excellent writing!

God bless~