The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
02/08/13
Nicely done...This was a well written and interesting entry. I enjoyed it.

God bless~
I think you have the makings of a good story here. There are many behind the scene people who make sure businesses stay open. I think it's important for the public to know what is going on sometimes and how stressful it can be.

I noticed you started off OK n the present tense then switched to the past. When using dialog, you only need one quotation mark at the beginning and don't need another until the end (unless the same speaker is speaking at the beginning of a paragraph, then you use a quotation mark just at the beginning of the paragraph to show the reader it is the same person speaking)

I think you have some good ideas about showing how what one person may think is no big deal, but to another person, that same thing can rock their world. This story reminds us as Christians how important it is that we each do our jobs that God gives us. Nice job.
Hi -

I like what you did with this piece and the ending is a pleasure indeed.
Thank you for inspiring me to write my piece on yesterday July 3, 2013:

Excerpt:
Proverbs 19:22 - KJV
..and a poor man is better than a liar.