The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
02/01/08
Love that boy's line! Perfect.

I felt like the end fizzled, dropped off, a bit. Darn that word count, eh?

I could definitely feel the teacher's building frustration - good job with that in particular.
I found myself getting caught up with the little guys dilemma, searching for the perfect gift, and refusing to settle until he actually found it. You created a sympathetic character who taught this reader a lesson - to hold out for what you know is real gold.