The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
11/24/06
Great title! It grabbed me right away, and its imagery is great for the analogy conveyed.

The story itself would have grabbed me sooner had it begun with the dialogue. I was drawn in at the point the father and daughter started talking.

Could relate to this situation, as our older daughter is looking into college for next year and both our daughters talk about what will happen when we grow older!
11/26/06
Very nice. I like the closeness in this family. You expressed it well, and I also enjoyed the dialog. Good work
Good writing all around, from title to closing sentences! I can't think of a single suggestion to make it better! I say: "excellance"!
I really like your style of writing especially the analogy of the teeter-totter.You write from experience and the love you have for your family is so welcoming it makes the reader want to know more about you guys--perhaps a book is in the making?
11/27/06
I love how wonderfully you wove your message throughout - wonderful dialogue and characterization. Thanks for sharing.
Your title hooked me right away. Good dialogue between the father and daughter, and I like the ending, too. Nicely done.
Good thought here. Good story. I enjoyed reading it and was able to identify with it.