Previous Challenge Entry
Topic: TEARS - (as in crying) (10/04/04)
TITLE: Boys Don't Cry By Julius Mendoza 10/06/04 |
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My father said “boys don’t cry” to me a lot of times. He said crying were for girls only. Was it like skirt that though I have legs like women do it isn’t just for men’s wear? Though I had eyes tears were for ladies. How about those who cried? I’ve seen a lot of them. Tom Hanks cried in the Green Mile. So did Nick Cage in the City of Angels. Hey, they were movies and they are movie actors, chided my father. How I dream I’ll become a Hollywood actor someday and cry too.
Let me start it by describing myself as a student. Modesty aside I never have had a failing mark. You see I’m actually an outstanding student and now I’m studying at the IIT campus of Mindanao State majoring in accountancy away from home. Whew! I’m free. I live in my own apartment. I manage my own finances. And I always get A’s seldom B’s never a C. So I prodded around the campus treated as a brain bombshell. People just look at me head to feet.
This is the focal point of my story. I have this subject Math 40 and it is about business calculus. Numbers?…….who cares! I have had a couple of nationals for Math Wizard competitions way back in high school. I really did have an arrogant attitude.
We would have only one exam according to our well-esteemed professor who is rather a pompous and stout woman with a Ph. D. That means you have only one chance. Nothing to lose said my classmates. They crammed and trembled. Me? I sat pretty relaxed and confident.
I managed to fill up my schedule to the extent of overcrowding my schedule with numerous extra curricular activities. Activities made me feel more an achiever. Being the editor-in chief, our business society officer and a debating team member were one of those. Flipping through the pages of my books was a no-no. I always went home burned out and so I go straight to sleep.
Unknowingly the Math exams came. I woke up late that morning so I have to run to the campus and catch up. The problems were like razor blades slowly blending my head into a soft soup. It was hard I admitted it. Nevertheless I submitted my blue book ahead of time. I was sure enough with my solutions. I went home dizzy and fell to my bed a vegetable.
Results were returned by the next day. My classmates I met on the way were having big grins painted in their lips. They passed, I thought. Then one, two, three or more said to me “I saw your result! You deserve it!” with warm smiles.
It made me excited so I hurried to see for myself. I reached the Math Department and there the results were posted. I went near and I dropped dead. I failed. For minutes there was blankness. Then the words of my father came back to me.
I looked around me. Many were crying and comforting each other. They also failed business calculus. I wanted to cry. I tried to walk away and fight back my tears. Yes, I cannot cry now! Now that I’m already in college. But….I gazed at my back.
I approached to one of those who did not make it. “Hey….I think they’re right”. He was confused and shocked. “I deserve this”, I held my blue book to his face.
“Oh Julius Mendoza right? I’m Mark Collelo a marketing major,” he wiped his tears. “You know what……it’s up to you what to believe. You have the freedom to believe them or not remember”
He suddenly embraced me. I was surprised. Only then I realized I was already sobbing on his shoulders. Tears were blurring my sight as they trickle down my cheeks.
I broke the “boys don’t cry” oath. Yes, Mark was right. It’s my choice in what to believe in. God! How thankful I am He reminded He created me free and He created my tear ducts as outlet of my tears.