Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: DULL (05/12/17)
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TITLE: Dimmer Under Low Light | Previous Challenge Entry
By Jack Taylor
05/14/17 -
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“You know how you get that diamond-like, sparkly, pierce-your-retina-with-laser-zaps, light, off-the-tips-of-the-waves, just as the sun kisses the horizon?”
“You mean when the cloud-bellies are blotted thick with orange, pink, red and silver?”
“Well, this wasn’t like that.”
“Doesn’t sound like much of a concert.”
A thumb stroked the face of the phone and other images slipped by.
“That’s me, reading; me, with a dog; me, with a bird.”
“Mmmm.”
“Me, with my mom.”
“My mom says all she has are a few pics of her in a scrap book.”
“I think my mom could wallpaper the city with all the pics she has of me before dad left. Those pics go out as memories over and over. She calls it sharenting.”
The bulb flickered out overhead and the two figures flipped up their hoodies and slumped down the stairs toward the streetlight. Slivery shards of silver betrayed the sprinkling rain. A car swished by.
“You think your mom ever did anything for fun?”
“Nah, once my sister overdosed mom dropped out of church and focused on working. She pretty well just hassles me about getting off my phone. Not much of a life.”
“I went to church once. Thought it was more like a peacock parade. Didn’t understand anything. Slow songs, long talk, everyone trying hard not to get too close.”
“I actually thought it was good at my church but no one came by when we dropped out so I guess it wasn’t that good.”
“Yah, your life reminds me of a joke my dad used to tell.”
“Tell me.”
“Okay, there’s this guy who has lived in the woods forever. He decides to go into town to see what’s new. The store guy shows him a chain saw and tells him if he uses this tool he’ll get his firewood done faster than ever. The guy comes back a month later and tells the store guy that it doesn’t work. The store guy pulls the cord and starts it up. The woodsman says – 'what’s that noise?'"
“That joke is as dull as the woodsman.”
“Yah, well so is your life.”
“Not as dull as April 11, 1954.”
The smartphone flickered up under a sleeve. ‘Sunday, April 11, 1954 was the dullest in history because on that day no one significant was born or died and no great event happened. Scientist William Tunstall-Pedoe invented a True Knowledge answer machine which sifted through 300 million facts to support this’.
“I think that’s my grandmom’s birthday.”
“Like I said…”
“Hey, look at this post. The most depressing day of this year was January 16th – Blue Monday.”
“Must have been a really bad Sunday the day before. At least we’re past that.”
“Yeah, look at what some quack said should be done. ‘Stay indoors and watch TV comedies; think about really bad things that didn’t happen to you; go to bed and sleep all day; go play something on your own.”
“Sounds like what I do all summer.”
“My uncle is even lamer than that quack. When my mom dropped me off so she could visit her sister last year, all he wanted to do for three days was to play couch tournament. Whoever sat the longest without getting up got to choose which channel we watched. I don’t think he got off that couch the whole time.”
“That does sound like church except for the part about who gets to choose the channel. Do you think church is meant to be so dull?”
“My old youth pastor used to tell us that we were special for the Lord and that he loved us like his own. I almost believed him. We used to play the best games and hear the best stories. If it wasn’t for my smartphone I’d probably be tempted to go see if it’s true. I just wish he checked in on me when mom pulled me out.”
“What’s stopping you?”
“There’s this one story that sticks in my mind. It’s about a guy who tries to read his Bible but the light is really dim so he can’t really see the words so he makes them up. I kind of feel like maybe the light at that church was so dull they’re having to make all that stuff up.”
“What else do you have on that phone?”
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