Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: ENOUGH (01/07/21)
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TITLE: He is Sufficient | Previous Challenge Entry
By Joy Bach
01/10/21 -
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Would I go blind?
As the years passed, the concern regarding my eyes hovered in the back of my mind. I married. Had children. Divorced. Married. That’s how life is. It happens. My visits to the eye doctor usually involved new prescriptions for the lens. Then prism was added to help with double vision. I had accepted the fact my eyes would always be a health issue.
Maybe ten years ago, my eye doctor began different tests, scanning my optic nerve. But I was not given any specific information about the regression of my eyesight. As the months ensued, it was requested that I have a semi-annual exam instead of yearly.
Just getting older? Still no explanation.
By 2012, scans and peripheral vision tests were scheduled. I sat in the examining chair at one visit and asked, “Why are you doing all these other tests? What’s going on?” That is when I heard the word glaucoma mentioned in connection with my eyes. But the doctor did not seem worried. Drops were prescribed to help lower the pressure.
At home, I researched glaucoma. There is no cure. And it could end in blindness.
My scheduled visits to the eye doctor escalated. More drops were prescribed. I now placed one in each eye every morning and two different ones in each eye every evening. Various tests were scheduled on a regular basis. I was aware the key issue was the pressure of my eyes. I began recording the numbers. I was told they wanted to keep them below 20.
Okay, so far so good.
But I noticed I had trouble reading, which I do voraciously. I closed one eye and then the other, checking my vision. Part of my right eye was blackened out.
I was losing my vision.
About this time, my beloved brother passed away. Crater Lake had become one of his favorite spots in the world. It was time to take some of his ashes there. Taking road trips was always a highlight in my agenda. I looked forward to traveling again. The highway was great, but I noticed when I went through an unknown town, I became nervous. Unsure of where to go. My thought processes turned to my eyesight. I knew my road trip days were over.
Upon my return home, I scheduled an eye doctor appointment. My eye doctor referred me to a glaucoma specialist. Help was on the way. An appointment was made. Pressures were taken. Not good. A surgery to lower the pressures was recommended. Laser beams were directed into my eyes, making little pricks, to allow some fluid to leak out, reducing the pressure. A month passed. I returned for a pressure check. The surgery hadn’t accomplished the desired results. Another surgery was discussed. Tubes in my eyes to help drain.
So here I am, facing possible blindness.
After that appointment, waves of despair washed over me. As a Christian, I tried to calm my fears with prayer and scriptures. I felt numb. As a writer, I have so many more books in me. I wasn’t even ready to talk to anyone about it. Saying it would make it real.
I focused on listening to my favorite preachers and Christian music, reading uplifting books, and choosing a specific scripture for the day to help me work through to peace. I finally reached out to others to request prayer.
I said all of this to reach this point. He is enough.
The Bible contains the phrases “fear not” or “do not be afraid” 365 times. One for each day of the year. That means me. My future is in His hands. He can work through the surgery. Or not. I am confident that He will take care of me, whatever the outcome.
My God is enough.
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