Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: Rage (violent, uncontrolled hatred and anger) (02/05/15)
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TITLE: Behind Our Closed Doors | Previous Challenge Entry
By Jennifer Champion
02/10/15 -
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“I will blow your head off and then my own, do you hear me?” The calmness as he said this to me was beyond frightening.
He turns from me and walks purposefully down the hall. I know where he is going. He is going to get his gun. I grab my purse and run out the door. I throw my baby girl into the backseat and I run around and get behind the wheel. I crank it up and through my tears, I back out quickly not even looking where I am going. I pull off and drive with haste down through our neighborhood. My crying is uncontrollable. My daughter is now sitting in the floor board behind my seat screaming for me. I can’t get to her though.
All I can think about is my husband’s eyes. They were black and he was so evil that he didn’t even look like himself. It is always like that when he gets that way. I remember when it first started; he would just criticize me. It was jabs about my mothering abilities or how I cooked his dinner or made his lunch. Then, the criticism turned into yelling. He would get in my face and yell as though I was some new recruit in the military. He blamed me for everything and took pride in making me feel horrible about myself.
“It’s ok, baby. We’re safe now.” I try to console my little girl as I turn into the police station. I get her out and run inside.
The officer behind the desk is helpful in calming us both down as he took down my information and filed the report. As we waited for a case officer to come speak with me, I keep recalling the day’s events and everything leading up to it.
After a while, the yelling turned into pushing me against the wall or holding me down on the bed. He would spit on me and tell me how pathetic a woman I had become. Every morning, he would come stand over me and stare menacingly. Through barely opened eyes, I could see the hate in his face towards me. I couldn’t wait for him to go to work every day. Today was different though. He knew I was going to leave him. He knew I couldn’t stay any longer so he confronted me and pulled out his knife. He held it up to his wrist first and then to my neck. His eyes turned black and his face turned red. He was distant and yet a mere inch from my face. I tried to run but he grabbed me. He tried to take our baby from my arms as I fled. I fought him for her and almost made it to the door when I heard the first glass break. Soon he was throwing dishes at us. I shielded my baby the best I could from the glass pieces breaking all around us. He was a maniac. He was enraged beyond anything I had ever experienced. I am thankful his gun was in the bedroom because if it had not been, we would be dead. No one knew what happened behind our closed doors except for us. Our church friends, family and neighbors only saw a façade. It wasn’t until today that the door was opened and the secret revealed.
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