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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: Calm (emotionally) (09/13/07)
But…

But I
am a leaf
slightly quivering…

But I have
been a ripple
that tickles silver sands…

But I have stilled
the thump of my heart with
the syllables of Your holy name…

But I have stilled and quieted my soul…

Like…

Like a
breath, a
whispered breeze…

Like a weaned
kitten who purrs with
throaty and contented rumbles…

Like a weaned child
no more blind and panicked
rooting, no more grasps from dimpled fingers…

Like a weaned child with its mother…

Like…

Like a
whisper, a
sweetly spoken caress…

Like a weaned child
ready to stand, to stretch,
to step, I grasp your hand, and trust…

Is…

Is my
hushed, hushed,
soothed and rested self…

Is my soul
when You quiet me
when You cover me, when You surround me…

Is my soul within
my soul without, my soul
yesterday and tomorrow, my soul there and here…

Is my soul within me
when You lead me to the place
where all is still—is still—is still…

Like a weaned child is my soul within me...
____

Psalm 131:2 (NIV)
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This article has been read 7747 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Ann Stocking
09/20/07
This exudes peace, serenity, tranquility, stillness... how many other synonyms for calm? Beautiful... prayerful...
Leigh MacKelvey
09/20/07
A lovely poem with with such meaning and beautiful phrases that tell of the peace, calm we recieve when we trust. Good technique!
Sheri Gordon
09/21/07
Wow, this is so different, so creative ... yes, I think I like it. It's soothing like a bubbling brook. Very nice.
Dee Yoder
09/21/07
Wonderful, wonderful! The rhythm builds and ebbs, and builds again, just like a stream. I love the gentle, trusting feeling I have when I read this! It makes me smile.
Dianne Janak
09/22/07
This poem made my day! in the frantic pace of life a breath of fresh air that speaks truth to a tired and aching soul~
Joanne Sher 
09/22/07
This is absolutely lovely - and feels anointed. It calmed my soul. Just beautiful and spiritual in every way.
Frank Creed
09/24/07
It didn't even rhyme! Sorry--When God said "poetry" I thought He said "grow a tree" and I was in the backyard. 131 was calm and I liked it. Big help. 8(
Jan Ross
09/24/07
This is beautiful and really ministers to me this morning. I'm no "queen" of poetry by any means, but I might have constructed it a little differently. (I'm struggling to offer my critique to such an incredible writer!) Feel free to inbox me for my thoughts. I love it -- I love the way it builds. I love expressing the Psalmist's heart--he's such a poet himself! Your last stanza is, well, WOW! Wonderful! :)
Sharlyn Guthrie
09/24/07
This poem breathes "calm" all the way through. Personally, I find the repetition of the word "but" in the first stanza a bit of an intrusion. I think it might work better to simply start each line with I. That's just my opinion. Everything else is absolutely lovely.
Joy Faire Stewart
09/24/07
My favorite in the poem, "Like a weaned kitten who purrs with throaty and contented rumbles." The poem is beautiful and right on topic.
Betty Castleberry
09/24/07
"But I have stilled
the thump of my heart with
the syllables of Your holy name…"
Yes! I have done this.
This is very soothing. Nicely done.
Loren T. Lowery
09/24/07
This poem is hauntingly beautiful. It is a voice, whispering back answers to a troubled soul.
Catrina Bradley
09/25/07
Beautiful personal reflection on the Words from the Psalm. Loved the rhythm of your original free verse. Altogether soothing. :) Cat
Sherrie Jackson
09/26/07
Jan, I think you did a great job on this. I've never seen a poem constructed quite in this way, and I really enjoyed reading over it. Don't fret - be brave! Or, rather, calm. ;-)
Kristen Hester
09/27/07
Beautiful poem. So you're a poet, also? You got lots of talent, lady. Good job.
Linda Watson Owen
09/27/07
What wonderfully effective imagery! Such a creative choice of that particular Bible verse! It's such a delight to see you enjoying writing in the free verse style, and it's definitely a delight to read it. Beatiful!
Deborah Porter 
09/27/07
Congratulations dear friend. I know this was something quite different for you, but it is simply stunning; totally out of the box. Well done. Love, Deb
Sheri Gordon
09/27/07
Congratulations, Jan. You're on quite a roll. :) And this is absolutely beautiful. You are a gifted writer in any style you choose.
Loren T. Lowery
09/27/07
So glad to see this; and after reading the story behind the work, I see God's hand in it all. Congratulations and continued blessings on your writings! Loren
Pat Guy
09/28/07
I finally got to your Free Verse that was sooooo bad it placed first.

It-is-awesome Jan ... and I'm glad I sought it out.

It's beautiful - exquisite.

If mine were only as bad. ;-)
Therese Witkus
09/28/07
A novice read a master for guidance, and found inspiring beauty. My gratitude for your sharing of your gift is beyond telling.
Therese Witkus
09/28/07
Still within the bemused state of awe, I meant to offer congratulations on the Editors Choice, as well. All the best in your writing.
Verna Cole Mitchell 
09/28/07
This poem awed me and ministered to me and stood out as mastery of thought and expression in words. Congratulations
April Bailey
09/30/07
Hi, Jan. Congratulations on your placement. Also, I appreciate you using my story (Fish ...) on the FW Home Page. Thanks, alb
Coleene VanTilburg 
10/02/07
Congratulations Jan on yet another beautiful, moving piece. You are an amazing writer, able to stir the emotions and communicate God and all His attributes in such a superlative way. I look forward to reading your work each week. Thank you for your vision. Coleene VanTilburg
Coleene VanTilburg 
10/02/07
As I read this over more, I could not help but think of someone close to me who suffers from anxiety and dependence on pain meds...What a great prayer...mantra if you will...to call out to God or to thank Him for physical retoration. I guess it could apply to any physical or emotional malady that keeps us wound up and away from God's calming peace.
Coleene VanTilburg
Alisa Wagner
10/26/07
I've never read a poem from a contemporary writer that put fear in me, like I was reading something that could not possibly be written by any human. I'm so in awe of the whole that I couldn't even try to pick it apart for why I love it so much!
Seema Bagai 
06/28/08
Congrats on being a double BoB winner!
Chely Roach
06/28/08
This is absolutely beautiful, Jan. Congratulations...again.
Dee Yoder
06/28/08
Again, very deserving win for this beautiful poem! Congratulations, Jan!
Verna Cole Mitchell 
06/29/08
And another congratulation for your recognition for this awesomely beautiful, inspiring poem.
Beth LaBuff 
06/29/08
Jan -- I'm so pleased to see this placing in the Best of the Best. Congrats!
Pat Guy
06/29/08
Jan, I didn't remember you had written this, and I think it was an experiment wasn't it? ;) Congratulations once again - it's awesome. Love,
Pat
Catrina Bradley
06/29/08
I remember loving this when you first entered it, and I'm glad to read it and be soothed again. Double congrats, Miss Jan. :)
Suzanne R
07/03/08
Another beautiful piece from one of my favourite authors....
Jeanette Oestermyer
07/04/08
I like the way you kept the spirit of the 131st Psalm throughout the poem. A most inspirational and uplifting piece.
Janice
Marijo Phelps
08/28/08
Incrediblly creative! A real grabber.
Anne Linington
10/02/08
I am glad to have my attention drawn to this beautiful poem.
Warmest congratulations, and a speedy recovery. Anne.
Mary Hauser
11/21/08
How encouraging: the Lord led me to Psm. 131 as I awoke this morning. About an hour later, I joined FaithWriters and read and re-read your poem. Yes 'be still and know' He is God. Thank you for your work! Mary Hauser
Cherry Bieber 
12/03/08
What an incredibly excellent piece of work and how wonderfully the Lord has allowed you to capture for us a glimpse of His Presence!
Juliana Gonzalez
02/17/09
This is one of my favorite scriptures. Thank you for pulling out the meaning for all to enjoy!
Thomas Kappel
03/30/09
Beautifully said!
Well Done!
God
has Blessed
you and
your writing.
joanna reed
04/23/09
Wonderful and well written. Thank you.
Ifeoma Dennis
10/03/10
I loved this years ago..and still do..