Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Merciful (07/25/24)
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TITLE: Peter’s Shame | Previous Challenge Entry
By Ellen Janson
08/01/24 -
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“Oh, Lord, I am so sorry,” he repeated over and over.
There had been so many people pushing on him. Everyone was shouting. He was so afraid, but when he heard that rooster crow, it was like a dog whistle. It jolted him back to reality, and he remembered Jesus’ words. When Peter looked up, his master was looking directly at him; his eyes cut straight through the crowd as if it was just the two of them in that courtyard. The shame was too much, and Peter ran.
Peter fell against a tree as the sobs wracked his body. He had been so proud to be a follower of the Messiah. Jesus had even given him a new name that meant “rock” - he was especially proud of that. Less than 24 hours ago, he had insisted that even if all the others denied his master, he would never. He was stronger than that.
But then he was oh so weak.
Eventually his tears wore him out, and he fell asleep in the woods until his brother Andrew found him.
”Peter, what are you doing?! Where did you go?! Did you see what they did to Jesus?!” Andrew was crying. “We need to go find the others. Everyone got spread out in the crowd. We need to get back to our meeting place,” Andrew continued frantically.
”I can’t go,” Peter said.
”What are you talking about? We need to go find the others!” Andrew shouted.
”I can’t go,” Peter said again. “I’m not worthy to be called one of his followers.”
”Peter, we’re all scared to be called one of his followers right now…”
“No! Andrew, you don’t understand. I denied him three times in that courtyard. Just like he said I would. I acted like I didn’t even know him to three different people. I was so scared they were going to haul me off with him….”
Peter broke down again; his shame overwhelming.
Andrew lowered himself to the ground. He reminded Peter of the many times Jesus had warned them about weak flesh even with a willing spirit. He began reciting Psalm 86 that they both memorized as young boys,
“…For thou, Lord, art good, and ready to forgive; and plenteous in mercy unto all them that call upon thee…” (Psalm 86:5 King James)
He spoke of their master’s preachings about forgiveness, and reminded Peter of the many times Jesus had told them that his heavenly Father was kind and merciful.
“Peter, Rabbi knows you love Him. You messed up. But that doesn’t mean He has abandoned you. Come on….we need to find the others.”
Peter reluctantly accepted his brother’s extended hand. He couldn’t stay out in the woods overnight, and he wanted to get to the others - he loved them and knew they were all heartbroken. As they hurried back, he thought about Andrew’s words. Maybe Jesus could forgive him, but he didn’t think he could ever forgive himself.
The next days were the worst of their lives. After the crucifixion, the group was lost. They spent most of their time together, but they felt like sheep without a shepherd. They tried to remember Jesus’ words and what they were supposed to do now that he was gone.
The day Mary came running back to the upper room banging on the door with so much excitement, no one knew whether to believe what she was saying.
“What were the angel’s exact words, Mary?” they all wanted to hear. She caught her breath.
“He said ‘Be not affrighted: Ye seek Jesus of Nazareth, which was crucified: he is risen; he is not here: behold the place where they laid him. But go your way, tell his disciples and Peter that he goeth before you into Galilee: there shall ye see him, as he said unto you.’” (Mark 16:6-7 King James)
Peter fell to his knees. He wept again, but this time with sheer relief and joy and thanksgiving.
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Apart from this is was a great read.