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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Write CONTEMPORARY FICTION (10/30/14)
Angel
November 5, 2014

She arrived home at the ranch a few hours before dinner on a clear night with a brilliant canopy of stars. Tomorrow was horse show day, and Annie was excited. She had worked so hard for so long training her horse, Angel. She could hardly believe it was time to show off all they had learned together.

Angel was an Appaloosa, black with white spots on her rump. The Quarter horses were esteemed and respected much more by the judges for some reason, but Annie was determined to show them what a fine horse Angel was.

Day was breaking. Annie had tossed and turned uneasily all night in the enormous bed in anticipation of the big event. With one eye on the clock, she tried to eat breakfast, but the food seemed to lump in her throat. “I’ve got to go,” she swallowed, as she abruptly ran out the back door, no time for leisure today.

The day promised to be sultry. Taking long strides across the yard, she hurriedly arrived at the barn to groom and brush Angel. She spoke to her horse gently as she pledged that they would both be winners. She had confidence not only in her horse but in herself. She knew she had mastered the ability to perform well. The light talk seemed to soothe both her and her horse.

At last, they were in the arena waiting to be called for the competition. The night was still and hot. She was tastefully dressed in traditional western attire, a glittering coat and a dark hat. She was a splendid figure with dancing eyes and straight flowing hair, and her horse stood with majestic dignity. Suddenly, the announcer spoke their names. They calmly entered, and carefully listened to the commands. Angel was doing so well, in spite of the fact that she was not accustomed to all the fanfare. It was glorious.

Just then, the horse let out a high, frightened whinny, and wheeled around almost colliding with the horse and rider behind. How strangely and suddenly things can happen. Annie’s face reddened with fear, her heart thumping wildly beneath her frilly lace blouse. What had happened? If only she could think. She went from hot to cold, and she wanted to cry. There must have been over two hundred spectators sitting on the rickety benches, eyes solemnly drawn to her. For a moment she and Angel stood motionless, as though turned to stone. She could perceive the judges critically inspecting them. Could the horse have sensed how nervous she was and picked up the negative energy? Could it have been the dull boom of a car backfiring or the woman nearby seized with a violent fit of coughing? It could have been anything.

Annie became vividly aware that she would have to use courage to break her ill luck. Eyes glistening with tears, she distinctly heard a voice speak, “You can do this, Annie.” Heart quickened, she prayed a prayer that motivated her to keep trying, and she became grateful for her trainer’s support and encouraging words. Suddenly, she tenaciously and aggressively nudged the horse around and calmly pulled herself together. Feeling no more helpless and small, her hands tightened on the reins. She reminded herself that her hours and hours of training could still pay off, if she kept a steady head. By this time, Angel was back in her familiar gait, and all seemed to be well again. She quietly told her horse, “Ours is the victory, but it is a victory that must be claimed, must be believed, and must be taken. Her prayers had made a remarkable difference.

The happy hearted girl was overwhelmed as she stepped to the podium, standing in the spot she had always longed to be, accepting her blue ribbon. It was one of those moments that would be as sharp and real in her mind years later. Her emergency had pushed her to the limit and back, but she learned that dreams do come true when you work hard, and keep your eyes on the prize.
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Member Comments
Member
Date
C D Swanson 
11/08/14
This was a creative and a joy to read. I loved the message and the wrap up. Well done.

God bless~
Toni Babcock 
11/09/14
Love horse stories, and this is no exception. You described the scene so well when the horse got 'spooked'. Good job! A couple suggestions however: The quote toward the end of the story is missing the quotation mark at the end. Quick fix for that one! Also in the beginning of the story where is says, "She arrived home at the ranch a few hours before dinner on a clear night with a brilliant canopy of stars." You may want to say she arrived home late, right before dinner, (as hours before dinner would not be dark yet.)