The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
08/15/05
I liked this. I was thrown off with the description of her being a young girl and then being called a grandmother, but sometimes I am a little slow so that might not have been anything that you did wrong at all!
I really enjoyed reading this! I loved the descriptions. I figured out early that she was in heaven (from the flowers blooming all at the same time), however what threw me for a loop was the last big about the buzz of the heart monitor...I wasn't expecting that! Great "twist" at the end!
Good job with this! The heart monitor at the end was just the right punch line! I stopped at this line, knowing that's what I also long to experience: "A timeless feeling swept over Celeste."
08/19/05
A very touching, beautiful story.
08/21/05
I agree. I also stopped at the heart monitor buzzing--very neatly flowing from one event to the next. I enjoyed reading this. God bless ya, littlelight
08/22/05
I too got caught with the 'heart monitor'. Then everything became clear. Very good entry.