The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
03/03/07
Hehe What a great lesson for the girls to learn, that they can be just as good as their aunt. There were a few grammatical errors. Also, try to find synonyms for words like "said, asked, and answered." Tried "exclaimed, or explained, or inquired." It give the piece more flavor. Great job overall. I enjoyed reading this.
This is a very good story. I was a little confused, however, when you said her mother took the box from her. I thought there were only the children and the aunt in the room.

But this was really a fun read.
I read this on just such a day... great discription. Good story. thanks