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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: CHILDHOOD (03/09/17)
It was twenty years ago.

“Alright Jonesy”, His mother’s words were soothing. They always were – unless, of course, he was in trouble. “Time to come in.”

“Aw, Mom. Not yet?” ten-year-old, Jones McKenzie pled with his mother, Maureen. “It hasn’t started yet! All the other families are still out here.”

This was the last night for the yearly meteor shower. It was always spectacular, but last night’s clouds had obscured their view. Tonight, the skies were crystal clear. Maureen sighed as she smiled at her overly curious son.

“Ok, but no complaining when it’s time to get up for school in the morning.”

“Thank you Momma!!!” Jones gave her a strong hug and turned back to watching the sky.

Just then, the “show” began. Meteors streaked effortlessly across the sky in a spectacular array of color. Jonesy smiled as he stared into the night sky. He loved every moment. Someday he would be travelling through the cosmos just like his father, Marvin, had done – before he vanished. Jonesy hoped to find his dad out there among the stars someday.

Jonesy was only 7 years-old when his dad left. It was supposed to be a mission to investigate a strange comet that seemed to be “hanging” in place a few light years past the three moons of Home World. His dad left and never returned. His ship literally vanished without a trace! One minute it was there, the next it was gone. Jonesy still remembered the last thing his dad told him the day he left.

“Jonesy, I need you to be the man while I’m gone. Take care of your mother.” Marvin said as he hugged his seven-year-old. “I need you to do one more thing. I know we may be one of the few families on Home World who has this.” Marvin pulled a worn, black leather-covered book from his bag and handed it to Jonesy. “You know what this is, right?”

Jonesy nodded his head as he sniffed back tears. “The Holy Scriptures.”

“Right. You need to remember what it’s for. It’s your guidebook. Let God speak to you through its pages.” His father scooped Jonesy into his arms. “Keep this book safe. Use it. Hide its words in your heart. Carefully share it with others. Let it be the lamp to your feet and the light to your path.”

Marvin pulled Maureen into their embrace as the family hugged together for the last time.

The ten-year-old swallowed back tears as he remembered the day they received the news about his dad. Almost three years ago today. Jonesy turned to see his mother staring at the night sky. He could see the various colors washing across her face. She was smiling, but there were also tears in her eyes.

Putting his arms around his mother’s waist, Jonesy pulled her closer to himself.

“He’s coming back Momma.” he said as he hugged his mother.

Suddenly, there was a blinding flash on the horizon followed by what could only be described as the loudest, longest clap of thunder Jonesy had ever heard! Everyone gathered outside gasped as they stared at the fireball on the horizon.

Just like that the meteor shower was over. It had never ended this abruptly before. People began chattering nervously amongst themselves as they started back to their homes. Jonesy begged his mother to let him go with the Planetary Defense Forces to see what had happened. However, she would not allow it no matter how much he begged.

“I’m sure its nothing to worry about”. She said rather unconvincingly.

It would be days before the story eventually came out. A very small meteorite had struck a military fuel depot causing a huge fireball and explosion. Jonesy had a hard time believing that story.

“I still don’t believe it now, twenty years later.” The now fully grown Jones McKenzie told Evelyn Pierce as they walked through a nearly destroyed cemetary. “It was during that same meteor shower almost a year ago that I received these strange powers. I’m not sure what happened that night when I was a child and I’m even less sure what happened the night I was...changed.”

Jones looked from Evelyn to the headstone in front of them. The names of his father and mother could still be seen even though the cemetary had taken an almost direct hit during the invasion weeks ago.

Jones looked into Evelyn’s eyes. “It may sound crazy, but I believe they are somehow connected to each other.
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Phillip Cimei
03/19/17
Your stories are always so different. I guess that is what Sci-Fi is all about. I personally am not a big fan of Sci-Fi, so it is difficult for me to really connect to it. It was a good read and interesting. I am not sure if the topic was weaved throughout the story. It seemed at first that the meteor shower was a good point of childhood excitement that all could relate too, but then it seamed that the story took so many different twists and turns. Some of the sentences could have been combined as they were tied to the dialogue of that person speaking. All in all it was very interesting and you have a great imagination and I know it would appeal to those that like Sci-Fi. Good job. God bless.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
03/22/17
The beginning was amazing. It was paced just right and seemed on point for the topic, but then I felt a bit confused. Even though you write continuing stories, remember each one needs to be able to stand on its own. You have a great passion for weaving the Truth with Sci-fi. If you keep at it, I'm sure you'll have amazing stories.