The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
06/21/16
Different. One thing I noticed is the numerous shifts in POV.
Wow! This reads like a small part a a much longer writing... one I'd like to read. Your MC's character was well developed for this snippet of a story, and I found myself feeling compassion for the robot woman as well as the man - almost as if "she" had desires and emotions herself that were doused and were fizzling and tamed.