Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: DELICIOUS (02/04/16)
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TITLE: Let Them Eat Cake Doughnuts | Previous Challenge Entry
By Bonnie Bowden
02/11/16 -
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“Good morning, Zoe. I hope you made the mocha extra strong. Sorry I’m late. I was adding up the numbers one more time. It looks like if we don’t get a buyer within the next couple of weeks, we’re heading to bankruptcy court. “
“I’m just glad our husbands got paid their full pensions before the plant closed,” Zoe said.
“Well those empty trays in the pastry case aren’t going to fill themselves. We better get busy. I’ll put on my apron and join you in a jiffy. Our customers wouldn’t like it one bit if they can’t smell yeast and cinnamon when they get here,” Lara said.
“Good morning, Officer Torres. Do you want your usual? “
“Yes, Zoe, I’ll take two black coffees and two custard long johns to go. By the way, have you had any bites on the shop?”
“No, and barring a miracle, Zoe said, we’ll only be here another couple of weeks before we have to shutter our doors.”
“I can’t believe an icon of over 50 years will close. Where will we go for the mouthwatering treats? The next closest pastry shop is over 20 miles away.”
Five-year-old Jason pulled on his mom’s sleeve. “It smells like heaven in here.”
“Wait till you taste the peanut butter and jelly doughnut. You won’t want to come back to earth,” his mom said.
“Can I have chocolate milk?” Jason asked.
“May I have chocolate milk?” Jason’s mom corrected.
“Well, can I?”
“Since it’s a treat for doing your chores this week, I believe you may.”
The morning went by quickly as the bear claws and sweet rolls disappeared from the shelves.
At three o’clock, seven members of the town’s small police force walked through the doors.
“Well to what do I owe the pleasure? Are you stocking up?” Lara asked.
“No, we actually came to buy you out,” Chief Lamont answered. All ten of our officers have pooled their money together. We’ve decided to save this town one doughnut at a time.”
“God bless you all.” Lara cried out. “Zoe, Come here! You’ve got to hear the good news.”
When Zoe heard what had transpired, she started screaming and hugging the officers.
“We’ve even decided on a name,” Officer Torres said, “The Cops Coffee and Doughnut Headquarters.”
Lara and Zoe looked at the beginning of a menu, scribbled on a napkin.
Menu
Chocolate, Silver, and Glazed bullets (donut holes)
Blonde baton brownie
Sticky bun
Maple Bacon Donut
Behind Bars Bismark
Strawberry taser
“I don’t know what to say,” Zoe said, as tears rolled down her eyes.
“You don’t have to say anything. We might have provided the dough, but we believe our small town will rise to the occasion,” Chief Lamont replied.
**********
As I was writing this story about a town in an economic downturn trying to save their bakery, I happened to read a true story about the police in Clare, Michigan, coming to the rescue of their own town pastry shop. In my original version, I was going to have different members of the community come to the rescue of the bakery. But after I read the story, I decided it would just be the police. (https://copsdoughnuts.com)
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I believe you meant to write "shut our doors" instead of shutter our doors.
I know in our tiny city that the doughnut shop was the local hangout of the police force.
Be careful about expecting dialogue to carry the story. It makes for rough transitions. For example the police's request came out of thin air- the reader wasn't told he entered the shop. :)
Blessings~
Congrats!
Blessings~