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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: HOPE (joyful, confident expectation in salvation) (03/05/15)
REDEEMING HOPE



The challenge just sort of hung there in the air before her like a carrot suspended on an invisible stick. She had always wanted to be the perfect role model of what a vibrant Christian might look like. Many times before excitement and hope had swelled within her after such an inspiring message as today's sermon. But by the next day all she could see was the ugly and distorted face of depression staring back at her from the bathroom mirror.

Bonnie kicked a stone down the gravel path. Walking had been a means of helping her to cope, a way to escape the growing fear and despair cawing like a flock of crows within her. But today Bonnie had agreed to think outside the box. She had grown tired of defeat and failure in her life; so tired of it that she was willing to take the challenge. As she walked, she pulled the Sunday notes out of her pocket and read aloud some verses she had written down from Colossians 1:12-14 . “..giving thanks to the Father who has qualified us to be partakers of the inheritance of the saints in the light. He has delivered us from the power of darkness and conveyed us into the kingdom of the Son of His love, in whom we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins.”
Bonnie mouthed the word “qualified” again. She was now supposed to ask the Holy Spirit to show her what these verses meant to her. “Father, in Jesus Name I ask for the Holy Spirit to help me understand how I am qualified to be your daughter, and who I am to You.”
Reverend Al had explained about the redeeming work of Jesus. It is about receiving Him into our lives. It is about the power in the blood of Jesus to forgive us from everything we have ever done. Repentance is a sweet beginning, ushering in all the mercy and forgiveness we need. At this point the Holy Spirit transfers us out of the kingdom of darkness and into His Kingdom. Pastor Al said that Jesus is our Redeemer at the point of salvation and forever after. He said so many Christians do not live like they have that redeeming love flowing through them. Too many, he said, live like they have no hope.

Monday always seemed like the longest day of the week. Trying to find her first coherent thought in a rush of activity at work was like finding her way through a traffic jam.
She breathed a little easier at the end of the day as she crawled into her car and headed home. This afternoon she felt a tear trespass down her cheek. “Darn it,” she whispered, “I didn't feel any joy today. All I did was put on the same old phony smile, hoping people wouldn't see the real me.”
She stopped at the Corner Grocery to buy some coffee. Turning sharply at Aisle 3, she nearly bumped into Mrs. Matilda Gabber.
The same bushy eyebrows raised their bristly judgment at Bonnie. “Sorry,” Bonnie mumbled, excusing herself.
Matilda was from the neighboring Community church Bonnie had previously attended. During those years Bonnie had finally ended an abusive marriage. Many in that church had sat in their spiritual squad cars glaring at her or giving her their warning speeches. Divorce was a not a perfect seven letter word, and God would surely separate Himself from her entirely.

Once home Bonnie slumped into a chair on her patio. “I took a challenge, Lord. It is about trusting you. It is about knowing who I am in You. Help me.”
She looked heavenward remembering Pastor Al sharing about the woman who dared push through a crowd of people to touch the hem of Jesus' garment. He had said, “Push through no matter what people think or say about you. No matter what lies the demons of darkness tell you about yourself, go for the hem of your Redeemer's garment. He is always there for you.”
As a gentle evening breeze tousled through wisps of loose hair around her face, she sensed a warm wind moving inside of her, fanning through the script of her life, bringing her to a new chapter. It blew one page at a time right past the wounds of rejection, the hounds of condemnation, and fingers of accusations.
“Sweet Holy Spirit showing me redeeming hope,” she whispered to her personal Redeemer.

FICTION
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Member Comments
Member
Date
C D Swanson 
03/13/15
You brought a beautiful story--that had an authentic tone--to life in this well written entry. Excellent writing.

God bless~
Toni Babcock 
03/15/15
This story has a lot of excellent things going on, the setting, tone, pacing etc. are all great. I love the first line of the 2nd paragraph, "Bonnie kicked a stone down the gravel path. Walking had been a means of helping her to cope, a way to escape the growing fear and despair cawing like a flock of crows within her. But today Bonnie had agreed to think outside the box. She had grown tired of defeat and failure in her life..."
If I had to re-work this Challenge entry I would definitely use that for my opening line. It pulls the reader in and gets the reader thinking - asking questions etc. without telling them too much at once about the MC. The part about her always wanting to be the perfect Christian could be worked in later. Just a suggestion! Hope you do well inn the Challenge.
Brenda Rice
03/18/15
Love the title of this entry. Your story is real and hits many of us right between the eyes.

Good writing.