Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Expose (08/22/13)
TITLE: What if...
By Carla Rogers
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What if the only way to know God’s heart is for mine to break into a million pieces?
I think of our adoption that has been put on hold. Having our dream child so close to reality to just have it snatched away, stretches my faith to the Grand Canyon edge. I hear the rocks of my faith foundation slipping into the canyon, bouncing mocking all the way down. Dreams of having money to help with missions or to redo our new child’s room to their liking are mist disappearing in the heat of the scorching Southern sun.
What if the only way to be thankful is to see your cherished dreams wither?
I go through my china cabinets to find something, anything to sale. The cherished old items of my parents and grandparents are downgraded to how much a stranger values my precious memories. Grieving, I look at selling Daddy’s farm equipment, the same equipment that I still use to plant my garden. The sacrifices seem so unfair and downright mean.
What if the only way to gain everything is to lose everything?
Giving up on my human efforts, I search for my old friend; my well worn, written in, highlighted bible. Longing to find some piece of hope, some promise that every thing would turn out the way I wanted, I slowly leaf through the tattered pages.
“The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. “ Psalm 34:18 (NIV). I feel the Lord touching my million little pieces, exposing his heart to heal mine. I feel compassion for others in the same jobless state replacing my self pity. Looking at the sea of people around me, I can now discern the hurting, longing to show them the healing compassion of the great God I know.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” Philippians 4:6 (NIV). Hope begins to show her head as God gently leads me to find peace in knowing God’s dreams for me may not be my dreams for me, but his will be so much better. If adopting a child isn’t God’s plan for me, I know that he will always have children in my life. I will be a mentor to so many more than the one we can afford to adopt. God showing me how to be thankful in the midst of withered dreams is something I cherish.
“He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all--how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?” Romans 8:31-32 (NIV). Jesus gave up the riches of heaven to come to earth with the goal of reconciling us to God. He also gave up every thing he had on earth, even his life, to accomplish his fathers will. I shouldn’t be any different. My love for God should supersede my love for anything material. Everything I have has been given to me by God. If he chooses to take it away, why should I grieve? I have everything I need in him.
Father, I thank you for always renewing and refreshing my spirit when I turn to your word. Your word is like fresh streams of cold water in a dry and thirsty land. Thank you for reminding me of everything I still have and the dreams you have for me that will come to pass. Amen.
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