Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Write something suitable for CHILDREN (05/31/07)
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TITLE: A Day at The Farm | Previous Challenge Entry
By Nathan Perkins
06/01/07 -
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What would he see there?
Williams has a big imagination.
He imagined that there would be and airplane in that Barn all covered in hay hidden there by a great and famous Barron.
As he walked closer he imagines that he would find a rocket that was hidden there by the government and that it was getting ready to launch.
His imagining was interrupted by a loud squeal.
He wondered “what could make a squealing noise like that?”
He thought that it could be the sound of car tires pealing out.
He imagined that there was a high speed chase and that the police were just about to catch a bank robber.
He was almost close enough to see into the barn and he began to run.
He wanted to know what was going on in that barn.
Before he reached the barn, farmer Webster came out carrying a noisy and squeally piglet.
He was afraid because the pig made that scary noise. But farmer Webster said “He won’t hurt you. You can pet him if you want to.”
William was a little scared but he wanted to pet the piglet. He had never pet a piglet before.
The piglet wiggled and squealed and William still pet him.
The piglet was scratchy with stiff hair on his back.
William liked the piglet. He wanted to take it home. His mom shook her head and said “no, William, we can not have a pet pig.”
Williams heard a new sound. “Kockadodaldooo”.
“Mommy, what’s that sound?”
His mom didn’t answer she only grabbed his hand and they walked together to a funny little barn with a fence behind it.
They stopped and look into the fence and they saw a big roster. The rooster lifted his head and made that sound that William heard, “Kockadodaldooo.”
“That is a rooster” Williams mom said.
William was glad he came to the farm. He had never seen a rooster before.
“Mommy, do they have rockets here?” He asked.
“MOOOOOOO!” There was another interesting sound.
“What’s that mommy?”
Again mommy didn’t answer. She just held his hand and they walked together towards another barn.
Inside that barn William saw a Cow. “Look mommy it’s a cow.”
Farmer Webster saw William in the barn and asked him, “Do you want to milk the cow.”
He look up at his mommy. She nodded yes. Them Farmer help William milk a cow.
William was proud of milking a cow.
Farmer Webster said, “Good job.”
William’s mommy said, “Good job, William.”
William asked Farmer Webster, “What else is at the farm?”
Farmer Webster asked William if he had seen the sheep, and the goats.
Then Farmer Webster asked, “Did you see the horse or the rabbit?”
Then Farmer Webster said, “Make sure that you see the Llama, the chicks, the ducklings and make sure that you go on a hay ride.”
William was excited about all of the animals. He was even more excited about going on a hay ride. He ran towards the tractor and yelled, “Hay Ride!”
It was a bumpy ride. William imagined that he and his mommy were riding in a train and watching the trees go by.
When they could see the farm again William asked his mommy, “Can we see more animals?”
That day he pet a horse on the nose, he touched the top of a ducklings head, he saw some big pigs playing in the mud. He pet a baby pig and he got to milk a cow.
After all of that William was very tired. He looked for Farmer Webster so he could tell him “good buy.”
He saw farmer Webster driving a tractor so he waved and yelled, “Thank you, Farmer Webster.”
He held his mommy’s hand and they walked back to their car.
As they walked William imagined that he was a farmer.
When they got into their car William imagined that it was a big tractor like the one on the farm.
He fell asleep in the car and dreamed about farming.
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When a parent wants to read a story to such a child, it is important to have accurate grammar and spelling. I think your piece lets you down a bit in this regard. But such things come with practice, so hang in there!