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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Gone Fishing (02/01/07)
quiet creak of wood screen door
muffled steps on gritty path
two figures in the dawn’s half light
one tall and stooped, the other small and spry

inky lake all rimmed with trees
wooden dock silvered with age
two tackle boxes stocked and ready
one dented metal, the other bright blue plastic

bamboo pole worn smooth with years
shiny new rod, never used before
two hopeful smiles, combined anticipation
one pale sun spreading streaks of light

two upturned buckets, waiting to be sat on
one coffee can, asquirm with wriggling worms
two shiny hooks, curving smooth and pointed
one gnarled hand baiting both with care

two tiny plips as lines thrown into water
little ripples marking where they fell
two buttered biscuits wrapped in paper napkins
one red plaid thermos and a plastic cup

a camaraderie that needs no talking
just waiting for a nibble or a bite
one special friendship spanning generations
gone fishing – just grandpa and his boy
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This article has been read 974 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Christine Dunn
02/08/07
I like the way you described the scene. Though using only objects, we still get a picture of the relationship between Grandfather and Grandchild.
Betty Castleberry
02/10/07
This is very sweet. You painted a very visual scene. Nicely done.
Marilyn Schnepp 
02/10/07
Utterly fantastic!!!!! Yes, five exclamation points. I dislike any poetry that isn't rhymed, until today; yours is just perfect, so much said in so few words; almost like a picture painted for us with nothing more needed. Got the picture Loud and Clear. Just Beautiful! A Winner in my book! Can't get over my own change of thought about poetry...you did it! Beautimous!
Sheri Gordon
02/12/07
I am usually not a big fan of poetry either, particularly when it doesn't rhyme. I often have a hard time "finding the meaning". But this is really, really good. I'm glad I kept reading -- you painted a beautiful picture.