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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: River (08/31/06)
Ben had been hiking most of the day and it was pleasure, pure and simple! He loved hiking and parts of Ohio were certainly the place for it.

Shirley, his wife, didn’t like to hike, so she stayed home and worked on the computer. He missed her company but knew how important and how much she enjoyed her work as editor of the town's local paper.

How wonderful, Ben thought, was the joy and beauty of nature. There was so much to see and do! His weekends away from Computer Services, Inc. was exactly what he needed. No computers to mess with, no phones to answer, no people to deal with and no deadlines to meet. Actually, it felt like Heaven...

Often on hiking days he would walk down by the Ohio River. There were areas of beauty and clarity but there were also areas that were littered and gray—-areas that revealed decades of carelessness and indifference. It was the run down littered areas that made Ben think back to the days when littering was the exception and beauty and order were the norm.

He continued remembering the Ohio River and how clean and beautiful it once was. Still, there was a certain kind of beauty but it was drab looking water, disguised and highlighted with gorgeous gifts of sparkles, given freely and reflecting from that “lucky old Sun.”

As he walked along the river he saw something quite unusual. A rainbow was arched precariously in the sky and it was unlike any rainbow he had ever seen before. The colors of blue, orange, yellow and gold were brighter than usual; he had to stop to look at it; the sight so transfixed him.

Then something bold happened. He heard thunder, saw two flashes of lightning and then a figure appeared in the sky above the rainbow. The figure was there for just a few seconds but he was certain that the figure he saw was the Christ.

What comfort and peace he felt! He wondered about the times he saw a rainbow but missed the image…Perhaps those were times when his belief and faith in Christ was small; just beginning. His faith was now much larger and stronger; maybe that was why he saw that gloriously, brilliant figure! But, no doubt about it, he did saw it!

And, oh the joy that it brought to his heart! From that moment on he knew that he would never be the same or take anything for granted—especially rainbows!
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Dolores Stohler 
09/08/06
While you described your walk, I felt I was walking with you. Your writing was good but I'm not sure about the ending. Seeing Christ in the sky sounds too much like the 2nd coming and that's not what you were writing about. I think the story could have held its own without the image.
Donna Haug
09/08/06
I agree with the previous comment. It seems the two events (walk with it's description and the 'epiphany') were too unrelated. Maybe a longer piece would have allowed you to make the link stronger. One minor thing - "But, no doubt about it, he did saw it!" I'm sure that was just a typo. I love to hike when it's nature as God intended.