The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 880 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Wow! Very descriptive writing. I was so caught up in the story that I could see myself looking into the fire.
02/05/10
I enjoyed your color descritions and I could so see my husband being the dad with the bravdo. Grrreat lead!
What a touching descriptive story.
02/07/10
A good story, some of the descriptive writing was overdone. Perspiration cannot roll up, other places it the descriptions took away from the story. Overall nice job.
02/07/10
I agree that there was some purple prose, notably the paragraph that featured 'grappling hooks' and a 'puddle of fear'. The second half was much better with good development of (1) tension in the dark and (2) intimacy and trust in the familial relationship. Keep on writing - you're definitely getting there.
02/07/10
You caught the feelings so well. I loved the Godly tie in at the end.
Wow, this is just great writing. I soooo enjoyed the story. Keep writing.