Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Volunteer (11/23/06)
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TITLE: Footsteps in the snow | Previous Challenge Entry
By Dennis Fletcher
11/30/06 -
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As he breathed out, he could see his breath. He looked around and decided to go down the alley. As he walked, he looked back and realized that his were the only footprints in the snow. He was disappointed, he had invited others, but they weren’t showing. He would do this himself, then, he had to. This was his calling. He pushed forward, his feet crunching in the snow with each step.
As he walked, his mind went back to last week, when the coordinator of the shelter came to his church to speak to the congregation. He spoke of the situations that sometimes lead a person to being homeless and he spoke of what was needed to help these folk. Then he asked for anyone who would be willing to serve these individuals on Christmas Eve. That’s when David realized this was his calling, this was God’s will.
As he approached the shelter, a small older man stopped him and asked him for some change. He thought about it for a moment and reached into his pocket and pulled out what change he had. The man thanked him with a toothless smile and headed toward the liquor store across the street. David didn’t care; he had done what God had asked him to do. He turned and walked into the shelter.
He couldn’t believe it, he was actually here. He was shocked; nothing could have prepared him for this. He looked around as he walked to the office and couldn’t help but notice the sadness and loss of hope on so many faces. He began to realize that these people were at their lowest and probably didn’t think they could get out of their situation. He also realized that a lot of these were dying, slowly, and it seemed no one cared.
He reached the office and told them who he was and where he was from. They smiled and asked him to fill out some forms. When he was finished they set him up with a broom and a mop and told him that they really needed someone to clean, as no food had come in for the night.
He set out, doing his job with joy. He wasn’t happy with this assignment, but he was willing to do what was needed. He thought maybe he could get to know some of these people. He prayed that God would use his obedience to change someone’s life for the better.
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You have set the stage for your reader to want to read more. I see so many opportunities, here, for you to pursue, individuals that will stand out from the crowd of sad, dying faces. I hope you write more!
Would love to see some dialogue take place in this story--that would bring the characters more to life.
I got to volunteer one summer at a homeless shelter, and found many of the people who came there delightfully colorful and endearing characters!
Thanks for commenting on Eon-Force Volunteers :)